provo fsa chapter

February LDSFS Adoption Training

2012-01-18T08:05:00.000-08:00

The dates and location have been announced for the next
Adoptive Applicant Trainings.

Friday February 3, 2012
6:00-9:00pm
And

Saturday February 4, 2012
9:00am-3:00pm

455 E. 200 S in Pleasant Grove

Hope to see you there!

Christmas gift ideas for Birthparents!

2011-12-21T10:28:00.000-08:00

Christmas is the perfect time of year to reflect on all of our blessings and to remember our children's birth parents.

Even if you are a procrastinator like me (I just mailed our birthmom's packages this morning!) there is still time to send a little something to remind those birth parents in our lives that we love them! I always come up with great ideas and then forget to take pictures of what I send so this time I made sure to snap a few photos before I boxed everything up!

This year I was on a very tight budget so I started by taking the kids to the dollar store and letting my oldest help pick out some gift baskets and treats for our birthmoms. We have a tradition where we like to send our kids current favorite treats with our packages so I made sure to fill their baskets full of stuff the kids really like right now.

I found this great gift set at Walmart that had 4 different customizable photo displays: A photo ornament, a photo magnet, a photo keychain and a photo snow globle.

I had already put Coopers picture in the snowglobe when I realized I
didn't take a photo of the box so here it is :)

Here are the ornament and snow globe with the pictures in them:

The key chain

And the magnet

And here is the complete package for each birthmom. Not pictured are Christmas cards for each of them and pictures that the kids drew for them which I included in their packages.

In years past we've done similiar packages but one year the main gift was a pretty little necklace with my sons picture on it.

Last year I made each of our boys birthmoms a super cute 8 x 8 Christmas scrapbook. Why didn't I take a picture?!?! They only took me like 10 hours to make and not one photo to show for it!! lol.

I also wanted to share last years FSA post full of Christmas gift ideas!
http://provofsa.blogspot.com/2010/12/christmas-gifts-ideas-for-birth-parents.htmlmake sure to check it out for some really creative and fun gifts...and remember it's not too late! Birth parents are so grateful for anything that we send them :D

Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

School Presenters Needed!! UPDATED!

2011-11-28T14:02:00.000-08:00

Hello again!

Hope everyone had a fabulous Thanksgiving filled with lots of yummy food, thankful hearts and fun shopping trips!!

December is fast approaching and the FSA is in need of more volunteers for school presentations. We are getting lots more presentation requests and December has quickly filled up. Any time that you could offer is such a huge help and greatly appreciated!

If you are interested in presenting but are hesitant because you have never done it before, no need to worry! You will be given a copy of the presentation and helpful tips on what to do during the class. It is very easy and lots of fun :)

We specifically need presenters for the following dates and times:

Diamond Fork Jr. High
Teacher: Melinda Barber
Tuesday, Dec. 6th
8:50-9:35, 9:40-10:25, 1:05-1:50, 1:55-2:40

Orem High School
Teacher: Natalie Real and Mark Clinton
Thursday, Dec. 8th and Friday, Dec. 9th
7:55-9:03, 9:08-10:26, 10:31-11:49, 12:57-2:15 (both days)

If you are available to do a class presentation please contact Jen Gallacher at (801) 830-1498

UPDATE: Jen is looking for a few presenters ASAP for this Friday, December 2nd for 3 classes between 8am-1pm at Salem Hills.
She also needs presenters for Monday, Dec. 5th- 3 classes 9:20-2:25 at Salem Hills.

and Centennial Middle School on
Wednesday, Dec. 7th- 8-8:45, 8:50-9:35

We also have a huge need for birthmom presenters. If you are a birthmom or know of a birthmother that would be interested in helping with presentations please contact Jen!

..

October LDSFS training

2011-09-23T20:57:00.000-07:00

The October LDSFS training sessions will be held at
the LDS church on 878 W Center Street in Springville.
For those of you that attended the June training and are planning on coming to this one too, please note that it will be at the church across the street from the one they were held at in June.
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We have a great line-up of classes planned again this time around with several new classes to introduce including a class on Positive Parenting, a panel on Trans Racial Adoption and a class called Knowing Your Preferences.
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We will be hosting a panel on the last day of the training and it will be an open forum discussion. This is a great time to ask any questions that you have!! If you would prefer you can write your question down and submit it anonymously anytime before the panel begins.
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If you would like to get involved with FSA this is a great time to help us out!
We are still looking for volunteers to bring treats to share, and help with setting up for the training and help clean up as well. Please email Angie.Harwood@gmail.com or Provofsa@gmail.com if you would like to help out.

Here are a few helpful tips to prepare you for the training:

1. Come with pen and notebook so you can take plenty of notes and jot down ideas.
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2. Read completely through the class descriptions so you know the specifics of what each class will be focusing on.
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3. Be prepared to ask any questions you have or prepare a list before hand to turn in anonymously.
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4. It's easy to feel overwhelmed by all the info these trainings offer but just remember that we are all going through this experience together! This is a great opportunity to meet each other and learn from one another :)

We are excited for this fun weekend and hope to see you there!

October LDSFS Adoption Training- SAVE THE DATE!

2011-09-07T20:52:00.000-07:00

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We are gearing up and getting ready for the next LDSFS Adoption Trainings!
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The dates have been set for:
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Friday October 14th 6:00pm-9:00pm
&
Saturday October 15th 9:00 am- 4:00pm
(Location to-be-announced later)

If you are interested in being a part of the FSA there are a couple of ways you can help us make the October trainings a success.
We are looking for volunteers in the following areas, please email me at Angie.Harwood@gmail.com if you would like to sign up to help:
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Help with set-up of chairs & tables on Friday the 14th
Bring a dessert to share
Clean up on Saturday the 15th
.
.

I will be posting much more on the trainings as we get closer so stay tuned.
For now I want to leave you with a few anonymous comments from our June training to get y'all excited for October!:

"This training has been a huge help to me. It has helped answer so many questions that I had! Thanks!"

"I learned that adoption is part of God's plan for some of us and that he wants our family relationships to succeed."

"I was able to learn how many resources there are out there for us."

"I enjoyed making new friends. There was a sense of understanding among the couples."

"This training has confirmed my feelings that we are making the right choice. I so appreciate the case workers/volunteers that have put so much thought into what to present."

"I loved this training. It was what I needed at this time. Thank you!"

2011-09-06T15:27:00.000-07:00

Hope everyone had a great Labor Day Weekend! I will be posting about the upcoming October LDSFS Training so stay tuned!

Meanwhile I thought I'd share a link, I love seeing positive adoption related articles even if this is a short one :)

http://zeenews.india.com/entertainment/articles/story95599.htm

FSA National Conference 2011

2011-08-19T13:49:00.000-07:00

The FSA National Conference was this past weekend, August 12-13th 2011
It was a wonderful experience all around and I hope that those of you that went where able to gain knowledge and inspiration about adoption!

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Julie B. Beck was a wonderful keynote speaker. She had some beautiful stories to share and a very positive view on adoption.
.

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The banquet on Friday night was a blast!
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The food was DELICIOUS!
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It was great to see so many of you there supporting adoption!

I found a fabulous article on the conference HERE if you would like to read more about it!

FSA National Conference

2011-08-05T15:28:00.000-07:00

The FSA National Conference is just around the corner!

Are you going?

I for one can't wait!!

Every year for the past 4 years the conference has been on my sons birthday so I've had to miss it. I was so excited to hear that they changed the date this year only to find out it is now on my husbands birthday!! Luckily he's awesome and encouraged me to go anyway! (I feel a tad guilty, but I'm going!)

For up-to-date info on the conference, click HERE. It's not too late to get your tickets.

It's also good to know that some of the classes at the conference can count towards your adoption training!!

Other great tips for the conference:
Bring your pass along/ business cards, notebook for ideas, camera for pictures of new friends, and an outfit change for the Friday night banquet!

Hope to see you all there!

Parade Fun

2011-07-28T19:59:00.001-07:00

The Spanish Fork Fiesta Days Parade was a huge success!!
We had such a fun time and want to thank everyone who came out to support the F.S.A!!
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A special thank you to everyone for making our "float" the best!!
This years theme "Adoption, Rooted in Love is The Way 2Bee" was awesome!
Everyone was great about incorporating the theme into their outfits, wagons, bikes and strollers!
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This is what the F.S.A is all about and it's the best way to spread the positive word on adoption!
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July 25th Spanish Fork Fiest Days Parade

2011-07-16T19:29:00.000-07:00

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I have some more information on our upcoming FSA activity!

We have been assigned to Staging area F.
we must be in our staging area by 8am
so this means that if you are planning on coming and
riding in the FSA trailer or walking along side of it,
then please make sure that you are there by 8am
.
. .

Here are the specific instructions:

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Directions to Staging Area F are as follows: Take I-15 to Spanish Fork Main Street, head south to 300 South (Canyon Rd.) and turn left (east). Follow to 1150 East and turn left (northeast). Follow to 180 South and turn left (west). Turn left (south) into Church parking lot at about 970 East.
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If for any reason you are late (after 8:15am), here are the ALTERNATE DIRECTIONS : Take I-15 to Highway 6 to Center Street (third stoplight). Turn right (southwest) on Center Street. Turn left (south) at stop sign at 1150 East. Follow that to 180 South and turn right (west). Turn left (south) into Church parking lot at about 970 East.
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PLEASE FOLLOW THESE DIRECTIONS CAREFULLY, AS SEVERAL STREETS SURROUNDING THE PARADE ROUTE WILL BE CLOSED BY POLICE, AND YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO PASS!!! . ***REMINDER*** PLEASE BE IN YOUR STAGING AREA BY 8:00AM . IF FOR SOME REASON YOU ARE LATE , YOU MUST FOLLOW THE ALTERNATE DIRECTIONS , AS SHOWN ABOVE. .
.

We are so excited for the parade and can't wait to see all of you there!!
Remember to wear your white adoption tees and if you'd like
you can incorporate our theme "Adoption, rooted in love is the way 2Bee"
to your wagons, strollers and outfits :D

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Upcoming events!

2011-07-11T14:42:00.000-07:00

There are two great events coming up within the next month:

First, the F.S.A will be participating in

the Spanish Fork City 24th of July parade.

The parade is Monday July 25th at 9am

We hope to see you all there!
We have a trailer that will be available for anyone
that wants to ride in it during the parade.
If you don't want to ride in the trailer you are welcome
to walk next to the trailer so bring your strollers and wagons and
come wearing your adoption Tees!

This year the Spanish Fork Fiesta Days theme is
"The place 2B",
we are going to incorporate this into our existing F.S.A National theme which is "Rooted in Love" by decorating our trailer to say
"Adoption, rooted in love is the way 2Bee"
in yellow and black (and white for our adoption color!)

We encourage all of you and your little ones to dress up to go with our theme! There are so many cute ideas that are free but I did look on-line for ideas and found some great accessories.

You can get this Bee headband here for only $2.24!!

These adorable tights can be found here

I will post more details and info about the parade as I get it!
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*One important note- This year we are NOT allowed to throw candy to the crowds. Absolutely no candy or water squirters are allowed. So we are opting to go with a "theme" this year to help us stand out to the crowds and help promote adoption!

..

Second, the F.S.A 2011 National Conference is just around the corner!!
The official dates are August 12-13th 2011
Davis Conference Center
1651 N. 700 W
Layton, UT

You can learn more about it Here

Now here is the exciting part!!

The National F.S.A blog is giving away...
a pair of tickets to the conference!!

Go Here to enter to win, but HURRY the contest ends this Thursday!!

Good luck!!

Thank you!

2011-06-24T08:54:00.000-07:00

We'd like to thank everyone that came to the
LDSFS training workshops!

In 2 short days, we were filled with loads of adoption related info, heartfelt stories
and sincere testimonies of adoption.
It was wonderful to meet all of you and be reminded that we are not alone in our adoption journey's!

We received some great feedback from all of you when you filled out your survey cards so thank you, thank you, thank you! This helps us to know what we did right and what we can improve on!

we'd also like to give a big thanks to all who helped make the training a success. We had fantastic classes thanks to some dedicated people who are passionate about adoption.
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And an extra special thank you to Heidi Pugsley for all of your hard work, dedication, and creativity in putting all of this together!!

Our next F.S.A activity will be
the Spanish Fork 24th of July parade,
so look for a post filled with details coming soon!

Location for adoption training

2011-06-09T18:52:00.000-07:00

Here is the address for the
LDSFS adoption training on
June 17th and 18th:
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It will be at the Stake Center located on
.
996 West Center St. in Springville

And remember...

The fun starts at 5:30pm on Friday night!!

There will be yummy treats, a greet-&-meet,and a few
break-out sessions before the
classes start at 6pm.

Can't wait to see all of you there!

More info on the upcoming adoption training

2011-06-07T09:27:00.000-07:00

Previously I listed the adoption training workshops to
begin at 6pm on Friday June 17th.
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The start time has been changed to 5:30pm.
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We will have a meet-and-greet along with some
yummy treats beginning right at 5:30pm
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The meet-and-greet will be followed by mini breakout sessions to help get to know each of you one on one and answer any questions you may have.

We are so excited to meet and get to know each of you and hope to see you there!

Adoption training workshops

2011-05-30T21:22:00.000-07:00

It's that time again for the next round of
adoption workshops from LDS Family Services!!

The dates for the training are

Friday June 17th 2011
from 6pm-9pm

and

Saturday June 18th, 2011
from 9am-4pm

There are many great classes
so we hope you can attend whether you've already
completed your adoption training or are new!

If you are new,
your Bishops reference letter
must be received by LDSFS to attend the training.

And remember that you must complete
your adoption training in order to be approved!

Here are a list of classes that are being offered in this round:

First Time Adoptions
Managing Multiple Relationships
Finding/Internet and Adoption
Picture/Collage/Birth parent letter/How to take successful pictures
Affording Adoption
Adoption and the Atonement
Rising above negativity
Unspoken Trials: You are Not Alone!
Birth Parent Panel
Raising Adopted Children
The Bigger Picture of Adoption
The Open Adoption Experience
Adoptive Couple Q&A panel

Please RSVP to the Springville LDS Family Services
as soon as possible if you plan on attending.

I will post the location as soon as it is announced!!

Hope to see you there!

The Celebrate Adoption Walk!

2011-05-18T13:06:00.000-07:00

The FSA's Celebrate Adoption Walk was a great success!!

A big thank you to the American Fork, Provo and Springville FSA's
for all your hard work and dedication that made this such a great event!

We introduced the new design for
the FSA shirts this year and they were
quickly sold out in all adult sizes!

There were many fun activities for kids to do,
including races and a mad dash for
candy at the candy launch!

Kids and adults alike had a great time
exploring the fire truck on display.
Thank You to the fire department for supporting us!

It was the perfect day for an
adoption walk around the track!

More fun activities for the kids!

Thank You Cosmo the Cougar for
coming out and having fun with us!

The kids couldn't get enough of you!

It was wonderful to see such a large crowd, of families, friends and birth mother's coming out to show their love and support of adoption!

We look forward to next year!

FSA's Annual Celebrate Adoption Walk

2011-04-20T09:50:00.000-07:00

Hello Everyone!

Angie here, from The Blessings of Adoption ! I will be taking over the Provo FSA Chapter's blog so bear with me as I get us up to date and moving forward!

We are so excited to announce the next Families Supporting Adoption activity which is just around the corner:

The Celebrate Adoption Walk
May 14th 2011
10:00 am
Provo High School Track

This has been such a great event in the past and we encourage everyone to come out and have some fun! It's a fantastic way to meet new people in the adoption community or to reconnect with those you haven't seen in a while.

This years event will feature Cosmo the Cougar, lots of fun games, the fire department and their fire engine, mini races, a candy toss, and yummy refreshments. The main event is the adoption walk where we invite everyone to get out on the track and celebrate birth mother's and the amazing miracle of adoption!!

Adoptive couples, birth parents, soon to be adoptive couples, case workers, extended family members basically anyone who supports adoption can come and celebrate with us. We can't wait to see all of you there!

Remember to wear your FSA t-shirts or to wear white!

Check out all the fun we had last year!

*Note- this event is usually held on the Saturday BEFORE Mother's Day, however due to a scheduling conflict it will be the Saturday AFTER Mother's Day this year.

Christmas Gifts ideas for birth parents

2010-12-16T09:43:00.000-08:00

Every year I try and come up with a perfect gift for my children's birth parents. It can sometimes be difficult to think of the perfect gift. If you are struggling with gift ideas or are looking for ideas for the future here is a list of some ideas that might get you thinking about your own children's birth parent's. There are so many different gifts out there here are just a few that we thought we would share with you. Hopefully you can find that perfect gift for them this Christmas!
(Thanks Lisa and Jenn for sharing your photos)

Handmade magnet board so birth parents and display photos of the child.

Handmade photo frames

Handmade boxes you can add photos, small notes of love, uplifting thoughts
and quotes, a small gift or jewelry.

Yummy handmade or store bought treats

Handmade journals maybe add a entry in the journal for them from you or the child.

A ceramic handprint or footprint birth parents love these!

Adorable crafts made by the child or with the child's hand prints.
The kids love to make these crafts and it's fun to spend some time with
your kids making these crafts.

~Ornaments (with childs' picture or one that matches the child's)

~Photo album with pictures from the past year

~A hand print on paper or ceramic

~A journal about a day in the life of the child
~A craft that the child made or colored
~A necklace or ring with either the child's name or a saying such as you are always in our hearts etc. or just a simple word like hope, faith, stregnth etc.
~A photo calendar with pictures of the child throughout the year
~Video's and pictures of the child if the child is old enough have them sing a Christmas song or say Merry Christmas to the birth parents
~Surprise them with a visit or a surprise visit to
come in the upcoming weeks
~Send a basket with all of the child's favorite items like
favorite food, candy, movie, toy, music, etc.
~Mini photo shoot (professional or with your own camera) of the child and put them into a collage or into a handmade book.

Gifts that don't include the child

~Jewelry
~Bath products (lotions body wash etc.)
~Journal
~Gift Cards (restaurants, massages, movies, favorite stores, itunes)
~Books
~Christmas decor for their home or room

These are just some ideas to get you thinking about your birth parents and what you can get them this Christmas and other holidays throughout the year.

Hope you have a very Happy Christmas!!!

Why Adoption by Rebecca M. Taylor

2010-12-09T02:10:00.000-08:00

I thought this would be a wonderful reminder of why adoption is a good option for single mothers who find themselves in this position. It also talks about where the first presidency stands on adoption. If you want to read this wonderful article please click HERE

It would be helpful to read this article if your life has been touched by adoption or soon will be touched or if you know of someone who is in the position to place a child for adoption.

Hope you enjoy this article as much as I did!

NOVEMBER IS ADOPTION AWARENESS MONTH!!!!

2010-11-02T22:52:00.000-07:00

The entire month of November is Adoption Awareness month! This is YOUR chance to get involved in any way you can! You could attend any of the wonderful events going on in Utah....

***ADOPTION WALK WITH ME 5K***
November 6th
At Liberty Park at the north east corner (look for lots of orange balloons and people wearing orange)
9:30 am Registration
10:00 am walk begins

This is the 5th year they have held this awesome walk!! This is such a FUN event for your kids and family. They have AWESOME prizes and fun things for you and your family to do either at the park or that they provide! Come and meet several adopted couples and families throughout the state! You don't want to miss this event!

Utah Adoption Council at BOONDOCKS

Saturday November 13, 2010 at 11:00am

$5.00 per family, cash only. Unlimited mini golf, 10 arcade tokens and 1 pass to choose from laser tag, go karts, slick track, rock wall, etc. Chili provided by Wendy's. At the Draper location only: Don't miss the Adoption Exchange profile adoption party!

***2nd Annual Conference on Adoption at UVU***
(presented by College of Humanities and Social Sciences)

Monday, November 22nd

$19 early registration before November 15th
$29 Registration after November 15th

For more information click HERE

If you are thinking I don't have any time in my schedule to promote adoption please stop and think of something small you could do. If you want to do something big to make a big impact on several people you can do something large! Below are some ideas to get you thinking of what would best fit your life right now.

Some of the smaller things you could do....

**Donate some adoption books to the library

**Go and talk to your child's class about adoption

**Sit down with your kids and share their adoption story

**Buy some adoption books for your children's library

**Educate yourself on adoption by reading a book about adoption

**Talk to someone about how adoption has affected your life in a positive way

**Send a thank you letter to your child's birth parents

**Work on updating/finishing your adoption profile

Some bigger things you could do....

**GET INVOLVED WITH YOUR LOCAL FSA!!!

**Volunteer to help with the high school presentations about adoption being an option

**Put on a adoption fireside to educate those in your ward/stake

**Post on your personal/adoption blog about adoption and what it means to you

**Put on a small or large event in your community educating people about adoption

**Have a movie night with some friends and family and watch a positive adoption movie

There are so many more ideas these are just to get you thinking. Don't let this month slip away without doing anything to promote the wonderful blessing of adoption!

If you are interested in getting involved with some of these activities or have any questions please send us a e-mail at provofsa@gmail.com and we would be more than happy to help you get all of the information that you need.

Adoption 5K Walk in Salt Lake

2010-10-12T23:11:00.000-07:00

You don't want to miss this event. Mark your calendars now! This is one of the best walks in Utah (besides our annual walk on birth mother's day of course). I've had the opportunity to go to this walk several times and it's by far one of my favorite adoption traditions with our family. The kids LOVE it and it's so much fun for the adults to meet other couples from around the state and to win AWESOME and I mean AWESOME prizes! This event gets bigger and bigger each year. So come and celebrate Adoption Awareness month by coming to the walk on November 6th at Liberty Park!!! Can't wait to see you all there!

There has been another activity added on the right hand side under Upcoming Events. It is a adoption conference at UVU for more information please click HERE

Once Upon A Time... Davis and Rebecca's story

2010-10-09T16:34:00.001-07:00

Davis and I met while in high school. We began dating our Senior year and continued into our first year of college. After Davis got home from his mission we reconnected and 7 months later, we were married.

When we reached the point that we were ready to start trying for a family, nothing happened. It was incredibly frustrating to have Dr’s appointments, lab tests, ultrasounds, surgery, and medications . . . only for nothing to work. We got to the point where we felt we needed to choose between further medical procedures or adoption. We prayed about it and felt that adoption was the path for our family but decided to wait a little while longer. A few months went by and we were talking one night and both of us felt like the time was right. The next day, I called the LDS Family Services office near us. They told us that the first step was to go to a meeting that was held once a month. It was going to be the next day. We rearranged work schedules and made it to the meeting.

As we approached adoption, we were really unsure how we felt about a lot of things. We didn’t really know anyone close to us who had adopted and we were especially unsure how we felt about openness. After talking to our caseworker about some of our concerns and going to a birth parent panel, our hearts and minds were completely opened up to open adoption. We felt that it made so much sense and were really hopeful that we would be able to have a good open relationship with our child’s birthparents when the time came.

We finished our paperwork and were approved in January 2009. It was very exciting telling our friends and family of our plans to adopt. As the months passed, we had several contacts from birth mothers. Some we emailed with a few times, others we heard from just once, one couple even called us on the phone to ask us questions. It was very exciting to have all these possibilities, but it was sometimes discouraging when nothing happened. All those experiences just helped us to realize that we weren’t searching for any baby we could find, we were trying to find the right baby and situation for our family.

Fast forward to early January 2010 -- we had just found out a girl that had talked to us for 5 months was a scammer, and another couple that had talked to us had decided to parent. We felt like we were back to square one and it was very discouraging.

A few weeks later, everything changed. I was working nights at a hospital and I got home from work around 7 on a Thursday morning. I had to take Davis to the airport so he could fly to a job interview. By the time I got home around 9, I was really ready for bed. I opened up my computer to check my email really quick. There was an email from our caseworker asking us how we were doing. I glanced through the email then figured I should go to bed and would reply later. I went to brush my teeth and when I came back to turn my computer off, there was another email with the subject “Adoption Possibility”. Needless to say, I was wide awake as I read through the email.

In it, “L” told us basic information about herself; where she was living, her age, etc. and that she would be having a baby on Monday. She also said that through prayer she had decided to place the baby for adoption. She was considering us as possible future parents and wondered if we were interested in talking and getting to know each other. I called Davis and we replied to her. Through a few emails that day, we arranged to talk at 9:00 Saturday morning.

9:00 came and Davis and I were sitting on our bed watching the phone when it rang. We had such a wonderful conversation with L. We just connected. We felt like we were talking to an old friend. We talked for 3 hours and as we ended the conversation, she told us “Congratulations, you’re going to be parents!” We could not even think clearly enough to express our feelings to her. We hung up the phone, called our caseworker, then spent the next several hours buying plane tickets, throwing things into a suitcase, buying baby items, and driving closer to the airport.

Sunday morning, the day of our 6th anniversary, we got up early and got on a flight. After we landed, drove a few hours, and checked into our hotel, it was time to meet L. She was living with some of her extended family. When they answered the door, Davis and I were so nervous! Then L came around the corner and we just hugged. It was so wonderful to meet her and get to know her a little bit more. We were really excited when she asked us if we would be at the hospital with her the next day, when our little baby would be born.

The next morning, we met at the hospital. L and I got to spend several hours together in her room while she was waiting for the c-section. I am so grateful for that time. The nurses kept asking us how long we’d known each other because we seemed like such good friends. They were all shocked when we told them it had been about 12 hours.

At noon, our little girl was born. As we were talking about names, we found out that there was a name we liked that also had special meaning to her birthmother. That settled that discussion, we named her Allison.

Those two days in the hospital were so wonderful. We spent a lot of time there, but also gave L some time alone with Allison. On placement day, we gave her a quilt that matches one we had made for Allison. We also each wrote her letters. She gave us a few things for Allison and us as well.

After L had signed the papers, her caseworker Eric came out to talk to us and have us go through the paperwork too. One thing he told me that was really valuable was to not feel guilty. L made a choice and even though it was a very hard thing, she had done what she felt was best. I was already feeling a little bit guilty but as I walked back into the room and saw L just sitting there holding Allison, crying, I really started to feel so much pain. It was hard to see someone I cared about hurting so much. That little bit of time that we spent together after the papers were signed was some of the most incredible, sacred, and spiritual moments of my life.

We actually left the hospital all together - L, Davis, Allison, and myself. We went to lunch together. Davis had to leave the next day to go back home for work and school, and L wanted as much time with us as possible. I am SO thankful for open adoption. We love L so much and that time that we got to spend with her was priceless. I was there until Allison was 10 days old and L and I spent several hours together each day. I wouldn’t have changed that for anything.

Leaving was exciting but also sad. I was so happy to be going back home with Allison and to be with Davis again, but we were unsure if we would see L again anytime soon. It was difficult to watch her go through those emotions.

Arriving home was so wonderful. We had only spent one night together as a family in our hotel, so having all 3 of us in our own home was so special. We just wanted to stay up all night and hold Allison. I had quit my job over the phone while I was out of state, so it was a big change from working full time to being a stay at home mom without much notice. But because I was a nurse that worked with new babies, I felt very comfortable and it was an easy transition.

Finalization was so great. First, our amazing caseworker was up on the stand and answered questions about us and our homestudy. Then Davis and I each answered a few simple questions - our age, how long we’d been married, etc. It was really simple. The Judge had a few words to say afterward, and that was actually my favorite part. He spoke very highly of birthmothers and the courageous choice they make. He quoted Mother Teresa, who said “It is a poverty to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish." He talked about how selfless birthmothers are and it made me so happy once again for the relationship we have with L.

Our sealing was the next day. It was the most perfect day I could have imagined. It was so wonderful to be back at the same Temple that Davis and I were sealed in. We had some time to just sit and talk and it brought back memories of our sealing day. Seeing Allison when the Temple worker brought her in to the sealing room was so wonderful. I got to hold her for a few minutes while the Sealer talked a little bit. Allison was so calm and happy, I believe she knew what an important day it was. After the Sealing, Davis was able to give her a Priesthood blessing, which was also a wonderful experience. Seeing my husband bless our baby was something I had been really looking forward to, ever since we were married.

Our relationship with L continues to be wonderful. I have a blog that is just for her that I update regularly. I also send her pictures once a month on a flash drive. She sent both of us gifts on Mother’s and Father’s Day. We were really lucky to be able to visit her a week before the adoption was finalized. We are also probably going to be able to see her one more time later this year. I consider her one of my best friends, like a sister. I love chatting with her online or texting back and forth just to see how she is doing and to tell her about Allison.

I am so much more of a fan of adoption now than I was before. Before I thought it was going to be a wonderful experience, but now, having gone through it, I can’t even describe how incredible it is. As hard as infertility was and still is, having Allison in our life is perfect. If we hadn’t gone through those things, we wouldn’t have her here. I would go through all the frustration, sadness, and anger again if I had to. I know Heavenly Father has a plan for every single one of us.

Allison will always know the miracle of how she came to our family. We made picture books that tell the story and even though she is still very young, she seems to like looking at the pictures. We hope as she grows up she will feel comfortable talking about it and asking any questions that she has. She will also have chances to develop her own relationship with L as she grows up. I can’t say enough how much I love open adoption. L gave us a letter the day I left, and she has sent us a few more since then, that we put in a special book for Allison. I am not much of a scrapbooker, but I am becoming one. It is really important to me that Allison have every piece of her story that she possibly can. I am actually making two copies - scanning documents and using digital pictures to make a copy for her to look at as she grows up, as well as the originals in a binder to make sure she has that when she is grown.

We don’t have much information about Allison’s birth father. He was not involved in the adoption process at all. We have a few pictures of him and L wrote some information about his interests and how they met, etc. That information is also in Allison’s book.

One other thing that we did was get matching jewelry. L and I have a matching necklace, and Allison has a bracelet that goes along with it. We wore them on the day of our sealing, and we also had our photographer take pictures of Allison with her “special day” blanket, which matches the one that L has. Adoption is such a huge part of our lives now, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I love talking about adoption, so if anyone wants to talk, or has questions, feel free to contact me and ask! davisandrebecca@gmail.com

1 Samuel 1:27 For this child I prayed; and the Lord hath given me my petition which I asked of him.

Exciting Tax Refund News!!!

2010-10-03T00:28:00.000-07:00

There is some exciting tax refund news in the works in Washington! This includes raising the refunded tax credit to families who adopt! If you want to read all about it please check it out HERE

REMINDER: Homecoming Parade is THIS coming Saturday!!!

BYU HOMECOMING PARADE
MEET AT 9:00 AM
MARRIOTT/HARMON BUILDING PARKING LOT
(Look for the Trailer with the large FSA sign)
WEAR A WHITE T-SHIRT OR BUY ONE AT THE PARADE
BRING ANYONE WHO SUPPORTS ADOPTION

24th of July Spanish Fork Parade 2010

2010-09-20T21:51:00.000-07:00

We had a fantastic time at the 24th of July parade in Spanish Fork. We had a great turn out with lots of new couples and families. We believe it is important to spread the good word of adoption to the community. We are always trying to find different opportunities to promote adoption and to share with others the joy and happiness that adoption can bring.

If you would like to participate in a parade with the Provo FSA Chapter your chance is coming up really soon. For the past several years we have participated in the BYU Homecoming parade. This year it's on Saturday, October 9th. We meet in the Marriott/Harmon building parking lot at 9:00 am. Just look for the big blue FSA sign, a bunch of adorable kids and awesome couples wearing white T-shirts. We would LOVE to have YOU and your spouse join us. If you have children who are biological or adopted please bring them. Whoever you know who supports adoption extended family and friends can come and support this wonderful cause. Please help us spread the good word of adoption!! Wear your white Provo chapter FSA T-shirt. If you haven't bought a T-shirt we will be selling them at the parade for $5.00. You are always welcome to wear a white T- shirt of your own. WE CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU THERE!!!!

BYU HOMCOMING PARADE
MEET AT 9:00 AM
MARRIOTT/HARMON BUILDING PARKING LOT
(Look for the Trailer with the large FSA sign)
WEAR A WHITE T-SHIRT OR BUY ONE AT THE PARADE
BRING ANYONE WHO SUPPORTS ADOPTION

If you have any questions regarding the parade or any of the upcoming FSA activities please send an e-mail to provofsa@gmail.com

Case Worker Spotlight

2010-08-31T10:13:00.001-07:00

This time we are featuring the beautfiul Lauren! She is a fantastic case worker! Thank you Lauren for taking time out of your busy schedule to write up this spotlight! Everyone please take a moment to get to know very sweet Lauren.

Tell us about yourself and your family.

I was born and raised in southern California, and met my husband (from northern California) while we were students at BYU. We have been married 6 years. We have two kids, Carly- 3, and Wesley- 1. We currently live in Salt Lake.

What type of activities do you enjoy in your spare time?

In my spare time I love to spend time with my family. My husband, Marshall, and I are rarely apart on the days we are both home from work. We are best friends. And our kids are hilarious. Marsh and I can just sit and watch them and be totally entertained making commentary. We also try to go out and do some sort of family day trip once a week. These used to be on Tuesdays, and so they became known as “Super Tuesdays.” The name remains, though these outings are usually on Saturdays now.

I love to read, especially when Marshall and I are reading a book together. I love to watch TV. We don’t have cable, so I find shows online. And I’m embarrassed to admit I really love reality TV. So You Think You Can Dance and Amazing Race are about as good as TV gets! I am learning to sew, but I am painfully bad, so I’m not sure yet if I enjoy it. I do love learning new recipes, like making bread and pizza dough by hand, and I am just getting into couponing. I love taking pictures, though I’m no photographer. And I really, really enjoy blogging. Once every couple years Marshall has my blog bound into a book- which is our family’s journal. Eating out is probably my favorite activity, but my husband hates it, so it doesn’t happen often. We go to the drive in for our date night every couple weeks. We don’t often have a babysitter, so the kids fall asleep and we can cuddle in the front seat. Our free time also very much revolves around BYU football. We usually make it to all the home games.

Please share something that is unique about yourself.

I am never good at answering these questions. Nothing about me is all that unique. Hmm. I have never broken a bone. My husband is the only guy I’ve ever kissed. I actually enjoy public speaking and teaching, like relief society or adoption orientation. I can talk really fast if I get excited. I really wanted to serve a mission but got married too young- now my husband owes me a seniors’ mission.

What is your favorite day of the week? What is your favorite time of the day?

My favorite day of the week is usually Saturday. I love spending time with my family, whether at the zoo, or a park, or the dinosaur museum. I’m also more likely to get my husband to take me out to eat on a Saturday. ;)

How long have you been a case worker?

It will be 3 years this October.

What helped you to decide to become a case worker?

In high school I knew I wanted to be a social worker. I just always knew. So I never switched majors in college or had to do a lot of soul searching. I also always knew I wanted to work for the church. I wasn’t sure between humanitarian services or adoption. But adoption is only part time and pretty flexible. It’s a great fit for a mom. So when I heard they were hiring after I graduated, I just knew that is what I was supposed to do. It has been so wonderful!

Have you had any experience with adoption before you became a case worker?

No, I hadn’t. I had done an internship with DCFS, but that was with teenagers who were not expected to find permanent homes. Really nothing in common with what I do now.

Please share an experience that surprised you while working as an adoption case worker?

I work with a lot of expectant mothers. And most don’t make an adoption plan. So one of my most surprising experiences as a caseworker was when one of those birth parent couples came back and decided to place nearly a year after they were initially my clients. I learned that you never know what seeds you sew, and which expectant parents might come back and place long after you close their file, after they have parented for months.

Please share a spiritual/memorable experience while working as an adoption case worker.

Working as a caseworker has allowed me to witness some pretty amazing moments in my clients’ lives. It feels almost intrusive or improper that I, a near stranger, get to be privy to the most important days of these people’s lives. I often leave work feeling like I just did 3 sessions at the temple. (not that I know what it feels like to do 3 sessions in a row at that temple…whew!) Some of the times I have felt the spirit the strongest in my life have been while working this job. I especially love face to face’s. I have been 2 or 3 where I have literally felt holiness around me. Where the spirit is so strong it’s electric. And being the one to tell a couple they are about to become parents. It is those times that I am just honored to be a part of it.

Open Adoption Blog and Other Internet Sites

2010-08-16T12:44:00.000-07:00

I've been fortunate to be involved with FSA (Families Supporting Adoption) for the past 5 1/2 years and have LOVED every moment I might add. :) We have been blessed to adopt two beautiful children who are now 4 1/2 and 3 years old. We have open adoptions with both of our children's birth families. We have been fortunate enough to have a very healthy open adoption with one of our children's birth parents. We have also had a very trying and difficult open adoption with our other child's birth parents. I've met several adoptive families who are on all different levels of openness with their children's birth families. I've heard of some positive and not so positive open adoptions. I've been to several adoption functions including four of the National FSA conferences which we also helped plan three of them. I have noticed that the HOTTEST topic that is ALWAYS brought up is open adoption. I have been surprised that this topic continues to be such a hot topic not just among adoptive couples and birth families but also with friends and families of those involved in an open adoption.

I understand that everyone is on different levels of interest on open adoptions. Some just starting to learn about it. Others are thinking about opening their children's adoptions, some are "experts" in the field and have been involved with open adoptions for many years. I know that my curiosity for open adoption is now because I want to have a healthy open adoption that is the best situation for both of my children. I recently found something online that I thought would be helpful and fun for others to read so I thought I would share it with all of you!

You may have heard of this site Open Adoption Bloggers but this was the first time I've seen or heard of this site. If you want to check it out click HERE

I've read through a bunch of these blogs but not all so hopefully there isn't anything that will be offensive or hurtful to any of you. I am hoping that you can read and learn about how open adoptions are for others in open adoptions conventional or not. Some have some great insight.You may find yourself nodding your head agreeing with what they are saying or get a good laugh at some of their posts. I hope you enjoy reading these different blogs. You can always google some open adoption blogs to find others as well. It may help you in your adoption journey if you have adopted or are trying to adopt and are interested in an open adoption.

They have organized these blogs into sections which makes it very easy to navigate through. Here are the categories

~ Parents who placed a child for adoption
~ Adoptees who grew up in an open adoption or who are now adoptive/first parents in an open adoption
~ Parents who adopted
~ Parents who are waiting to adopt
~Siblings and Parents of triad members
~ Professionals working in the field of open adoption

Click HERE to check out these fun blogs!

Here are some other resources I've found online for open adoption that may be helpful.

Open Adoption Resource and Support Click HERE
Adoption.com Info on Open Adoptions Click HERE and HERE
Open Adoption Statistics Click HERE
Article in the NEw York Times 2008 Click HERE
Info on Open adoption Click HERE

This should give you a good head start on leaning more about open adoption.

Once Upon A Time... Lance and Julie's Story

2010-08-07T15:12:00.000-07:00

Well hello! We’re Lance, Julie and Zachary! We’re sticking to the Q/A format like everyone else since it seems easiest to read! We hope you enjoy our story and that it can be of some help :)

How did you meet? Tell us about your love story and your family.
Lance and I met in a Single’s Ward at USU in fall 2005. At the time Lance was the ward clerk and I was a starry-eyed sophomore who found his rosy red cheeks extremely irresistible! One night he invited our entire apartment (5 girls!) over for dinner. I staked my claim with the roomies right after. It took all the courage I could muster, but with some prodding from my roommate I asked Lance to a girl’s choice institute dance a few weeks later. It was the best thing I ever did! We had a blast, started dating and were married a year and a half later in May 2007.
Since then we have both graduated from USU. Lance works for Nestle as a quality assurance tech and I am a stay at home mom to our 4 month old little boy Zachary, who is adopted. He is the sweetest little guy and has brought so much joy into our lives. We love him so much and can’t remember life without him!

What helped you in your decision to adopt?
We both knew that we wanted children. Seven months into our marriage at a routine checkup our doctor noticed that we might have trouble having kids and wanted to do more tests. Weeks and tests later our doctor presented us with three options: don’t have kids, adopt, or do a surgery he was 95% sure wouldn’t be affective. Not having children was NEVER an option for us. We both felt like there were spirits that were supposed to come to our home. We prayed about what we should do and felt peace in the decision to adopt. Because we had only been married for 7 months and most adoption agencies require couples to be married for several years before consideration we used our waiting time to finish school and grow closer as a couple.

What fears did you have before you started the process, during the process and after placement? It was hard knowing that we couldn’t have children on our own. We shed many tears and sometimes we felt angry. We found comfort in the gospel and the fact that God had a plan for us and our family. We were scared of the wait at first. We didn’t know a whole lot about adoption, but we had heard that it often takes years to adopt. We already had a guaranteed year and a half before starting our paperwork + the uncertainty of how long it would be after that. Once we started opening up about our decision to adopt people were very opinionated and without fail most of them would tell us horror stories (most of which are really not true, don’t believe them) about failed placements or court battles. It scared us to death.

When we first started the process we were really nervous about openness. It seemed intimidating to meet birth parents and share your life with them. As we took more classes and progressed in our paperwork our fears about openness lessened, and when we met Trudy, Zachary’s birthmother, openness didn’t seem scary at all, we absolutely love her! We feel really good about our adoption and feel like we have a great relationship with Trudy. Honestly, adoption is extremely emotional, stressful, scary, and it’s hard, it really is. BUT it has been such a huge blessing in our lives and we have grown so much!

Tell us about when you met your child’s birth parents for the first time.
While we were doing our paperwork we both felt very impressed that we needed to hurry, so we rushed it as fast as we could. The circumstances surrounding our first meeting with Trudy were really sad. We’d been approved for about three weeks ( I know, it was FAST) when we got a phone call from my dad. My little sister was 38 ½ weeks pregnant and her baby boy had died. The cord wrapped around his neck and he was stillborn just a few days before Thanksgiving. The night before his funeral I got a phone call from an unknown number. It was a friend who lived next door to me the year that I met Lance. She followed our blog and knew that we were adopting and wanted to tell us about her sister-in-laws, sister (Trudy) who was pregnant. She had told her sister about us and she spread the word to Trudy…Trudy wanted to meet us!

We ended up meeting Trudy right after my nephew’s funeral. Before we got to our meeting place we had a huge surge of nerves and called our caseworker for any last minute tips. It was our first time meeting a birth mother so we didn’t know what to expect. Our caseworker didn’t answer so we took a deep breath and decided just to follow the Spirit!

It turned out that we didn’t need to worry. We met up with Trudy (her sister was with her) and we had drinks and talked for an hour—it felt like five minutes. We asked a lot of questions and got to know each other. At the end of our meeting we exchanged information with the understanding that nothing had been decided but that we would stay in touch. I felt in my heart though that this was it, I kept telling Lance this was it and he kept telling me to be cautious and not to get my hopes up. It was so natural meeting Trudy, I felt like we’d known her forever and were just being reunited.

Tell us how you were chosen and how it felt. Any fears? Excitement? Stress anything you would like to share about this experience.
We met Trudy on a Saturday. We texted each other throughout the weekend with questions we had forgotten. On Monday I got a call from my caseworker, my heart about jumped out of my chest (I knew it was her because I assigned a special ringtone!) I thought it was THE call, but it turned out she was just calling me back from when we had called Saturday. I told her about meeting Trudy and she told me she would call her caseworker and try to get more information.
A few hours later she called me back and told me Trudy wanted to meet with us again the next night! I called Lance at work totally excited to make sure he could get off in time for us to make the three hour drive! Our caseworker gave us tips and told us to make sure to take a birth parent gift. We agonized over what to get Trudy, but we prayed about it and finally found something that ended up being perfect! We met her at the agency and met her caseworker as well. We talked for a while and then we gave Trudy her gift. After talking for a while longer she handed us a card. We opened it and inside were three ultrasound pictures, and a card congratulating us on being chosen! At first I was just totally in shock, then we jumped up and hugged her, we were SO excited. I thought I would cry when we were chosen, but we were too excited.

Honestly, I wasn’t really surprised. After meeting Trudy I had a feeling that she was our child’s birthmother. When she chose us, it just felt totally right to me! Lance was in shock, and I kept him up all night with statements like, “You’re going to be a daddy!” followed by an excited giggle…

What gifts did you give your child’s birth parents?
For our placement gifts I made a small quilt for Trudy, and a matching one for Zac. My best friend wrote a poem for her about the quilts and the special bond that Trudy and Zac share. We also got a stuffed moose (Lance had a stuffed moose growing up) for Zac and Trudy so that we can take pictures next to it each month and she can see how he’s growing. We each wrote Trudy a letter the night before placement, and we gave her a ring with Zac’s birthstone in it. We didn’t want Trudy to have to leave the hospital empty handed while we left with a baby. However, I don’t think the gifts themselves were that important, but the feeling of love behind them.

What thoughts, fears, feelings did you have before placement?
We had a lot of time to worry before Zac was born. Fortunately we both felt very confident that our adoption was going to happen. Trudy was very open and honest with us, and she wanted us to be very involved in her pregnancy which was really reassuring. Despite that, we still had the normal worries that she might change her mind, or the birthfather might try and claim paternity. With my nephew’s death being so recent we had the added fear that something would go wrong medically. We were really worried about how we would be treated at the hospital (Trudy wanted us there for the birth) and nervous about bonding after Zac arrived. Mostly though, we were excited and anxious for him to arrive!

Tell us about your placement experience. Was it everything you dreamed it to be? Was it hard, easy or spiritual?
Our placement was amazing. Zac was born early on a Friday morning and our placement was Sunday afternoon. We had two amazing days in the hospital with Trudy and Zac, and our love for her grew so much! We got to meet a lot of her family, and she got to meet lots of our family (which was really nice of her to let them come!) Trudy was so strong the entire time and always seemed so together. On Saturday night we went to our hotel early so that Trudy could have time alone. I spent the entire night thinking about her, weeping for her, and praying for her. My heart felt like it was breaking, I knew how much she loved him and how hard it was going to be. I didn’t sleep much that night.

We woke up in the morning and took our time getting ready. We went to breakfast, but I was to queasy to eat much. When we arrived at the hospital I could tell that Trudy had been crying, and it made me cry all over again. We visited with her while she held Zac (we had decided to let her hold him the whole day until placement) she asked if we wanted to hold him and it was hard to say no when of course we did! We had an awesome morning just visiting and talking about our openness.

The caseworkers finally came and they sent us to a different room so that Trudy could sign. I sobbed the entire time, it was the happiest sad. They finally came into the room about forty minutes later and we signed our paperwork as fast as we possibly could! We went back into Trudy ‘s room and exchanged gifts and hugged. Her caseworker had us all say how we were feeling and we all bawled like crazy. Trudy placed Zachary in Lance’s arms—I wanted her too because I had gotten to watch his birth and cut his umbilical cord. We took a bunch of pictures and hugged each other like crazy, then we walked out and got into our separate cars. It was a really hard experience. We felt so happy and excited, yet so guilty for how sad Trudy was and how hard it would be for her. The best part about it was that the Spirit was so strong, and there was so much love in that hospital! I think that anybody who is anti-adoption should experience that feeling, because it is the most unselfish, loving thing in the entire world! It was seriously amazing, and I still tear up writing about it.

How did you feel after bringing your child home for the first time?
The first few weeks we had Zac home I felt like we were wrapped in a bubble. Our home was so peaceful and so love-filled. It’s hard to comprehend how much life changes with a baby, love increases exponentially! We were lucky that Zac is such a good baby. He slept in four hour increments, woke up to eat, and then slept again. He wasn’t fussy, in fact he made this fun squeaking sound instead of crying! Despite that, it’s still an adjustment being a parent and we were pretty tired and emotionally exhausted! I don’t think I went anywhere the first week he was born, we sat home and held him and stared at him, trying to soak it all up! He had the cutest little sideburns, and a half smile that I called his ‘Elvis’ smile.

We had some funny moments with our little guy. Exploding bottles, poo-explosions and soaked clothing-he peed like a champ. In the first week he was home I can’t even remember how many times he peed on us, but it was a lot! It was so surreal to finally have him in our home, and since he had come so early (he was born on the 19th) we had to rush to get stuff finished after we brought him home. Our family was super supportive and accepting and it was so fun to be able to introduce Zac to all of our friend and family who hadn’t made it to the hospital!
I was worried about bonding with Zachary, but the second I saw his perfect little face, I knew that he was my son. I knew that it was not our first time meeting. It was a really amazing experience, and I was so grateful that the love was instantaneous!

What is your relationship like with the birth parents? Has it changed? How have your feelings changed about adoption since you first started the process? How has adoption affected your life good or bad?
Our relationship with Zac’s birthmother is amazing. We don’t have a strict openness plan, we decided to be flexible and kind of ‘go with the flow’. We text each other a lot, and we’ve visited her four or five times since Zac has been born. We are really comfortable just stopping by and visiting when we’re nearby or for Trudy to stop by if she’s in the area. We pray for her everyday and we just love her so much, words could never describe our gratitude. Our relationship has changed, we don’t talk as much as we used to, we’re both super busy with our new lives…but we know that the other is there if we ever need to talk, it’s wonderful!

We don’t know Zac’s birth father. He wasn’t involved in the adoption experience, so we don’t really know much about him. When the time comes that Zac is curious about him we are hoping that he will find comfort asking Trudy questions about him.

I definitely didn’t really understand adoption until we became so involved in the process. It’s hard not to just believe all of the misconceptions or stereotypes unless you are doing it yourself. It’s so different than I ever imagined it, but in a good way. I truly have a testimony of adoption and know that it is a gift from Heavenly Father, and that it takes so much love and courage from the birth parents. I can only say good things about adoption, it brought us our son, we love it and are excited for more experiences in the future!

What hopes and dreams do you have for your child? How do you plan on discussing adoption with your child? Do you have any concerns or fears in raising a child who is adopted?
We want Zacharyto be happy and know no matter what that he is loved. We want him to have a strong testimony and to develop talents. We want him to accomplish all of his dreams. We have big dreams for him, just like any parents, and we can see so much potential in this little guy! We finally understand how much our parents love us and it’s incredible!

The beauty of open adoption is that Trudy will never be a stranger to Zachary. He’ll grow up knowing her, talking to her, visiting her. Being adopted will just be the normal thing in our family. We already tell him his adoption story and tell him every day how much Trudy loves him. There are a lot of fears with raising an adoption child, most the same as raising a biological child, but we think that openness takes away a lot of the uncertainty and helps the child understand that they weren’t “given away” but that they were loved so much that their birth mother wanted more for them. More fears may arise, but thankfully we have so many amazing people all around to look to for guidance!

Time dragged before Zachary was born, but since he’s been here it feels like it’s flying by! We’ve had two visits with our caseworker, met our attorney, and we’ll have our court date scheduled within the next week. We’re excited for our adoption to be finalized, and especially to go to the temple, but we feel like it’s just a formality. We know that Zachary is part of our family, and that Heavenly Father’s plan to get him to us was special but very necessary. We don’t ever think of him as ‘adopted’, he’s just our son, and we couldn’t possibly love him more! We love adoption, and would love to chat if you have any questions!

Love, Lance & Julie
http://lanceandjulie.blogspot.com.

Provo chapter Facebook page

2010-07-25T23:35:00.000-07:00

We are so excited that our chapter has a facebook page! If you would like to check it out click HERE!! Our FSA board is always trying to find ways to reach out to the Provo chapter adoptive couples and families. We would like to use this page to inform everyone of upcoming activities and events going on in our community. Please go and check it out and make sure you click on the like button. Check out the page often to see what activities we have going on. Again click HERE to check out the facebook page.

Also a reminder that the National Adoption Conference is THIS FRIDAY and SATURDAY!! If you haven't registered you can register HERE We hope to see you there!!! We are POSITIVE it's going to be AMAZING!!!

24th of July Spanish Fork Parade

2010-07-19T07:45:00.000-07:00

(Please click the flyer to make it bigger and easier to read)

It's that time of year again!! We will be in one of the BIGGEST parade's in Utah on Saturday July 24th in Spanish Fork! This will be our third year participating in the Spanish Fork parade. We need as many people who are supportive of adoption to come and support adoption and promote adoption to the community! This is an excellent way to promote adoption in a positive way. We always have a great time hearing people in the community yell out that they have a connection to adoption. Couples and kids always have a blast at the parade! This is a activity you don't want to miss. PLEASE come and bring ANYONE (friends, family, neighbors, etc)!! Come be in the parade with the Provo FSA float! Pass this on to anyone you know who would be interested in coming to the parade. Above is a flyer for the event. If you have any questions please e-mail provofsa@gmail.com

HOPE TO SEE YOU THERE!!

Once Upon A Time...Mike and Mary's Story

2010-07-08T21:24:00.000-07:00

Hi! We are Mike and Mary. We thought it might make this easier to read through if we wrote it in question/answer form. Hopefully our experiences can help others who are just starting the process to understand adoption better. We know that all adoptions are different, but here is our story!

How did you and your spouse meet? Tell us a little bit about your love story and your family.

We met at a stake Valentine's Day dance about 7 years ago. Mike got to the dance just as it was about to end, saw Mary, who he recognized from high school, and asked her to dance. They danced the last two songs, and then Mike made his move, saying to Mary (very suavely), "You know, I came to this dance tonight looking for a valentine." He thought he had this in the bag. Then Mary replied, "Well, if you came a little earlier, you probably would have found one." Ouch! Despite that slightly awkward (and now funny) beginning, we started dating about a month later. Almost as soon as we started dating, we both knew that we wanted to be together always. We were married about 7 years ago and have so much fun together.

We both graduated from BYU and now Mike works as a project manager for a software company and Mary is a stay at home mom. A lot of Mike’s family live close by and we get to hang out with them a lot, and most of Mary’s family is back east (she grew up in Connecticut). We are a fun and silly family that likes to do a lot of things together.
Do you have children, and are they adopted or biological?

We have a daughter named Rachel, who is almost two. We adopted her when she was born. She is simply the light of our lives, and we love her to pieces. We keep thinking that there’s no way we can love her more than we already do, but every day it just keeps getting better and better.

What helped you in your decision to adopt?

After 3 years of trying to conceive and going through fertility treatments, we began to consider adoption. Our first step was to borrow some books about adoption from the library. It all seemed very confusing, and we didn’t know what to do or expect, but after a lot of talking and praying, we both felt that adoption was the way our family was meant to be created. We got in contact with LDS Family Services and attended an information meeting, and a few months after that were approved and waiting.

What fears did you have before you started the process, during the process and after placement?

Adoption can seem like a very scary thing when you’re going through it for the first time. We had so many different worries and fears. What if we never got chosen? What if we said or did something wrong in talking to a potential birth mom? What if the placement doesn’t go through? But looking back, we know we didn’t need to worry, and we found that if we were just ourselves, everything would work out the way it was supposed to. Even when we had a failed placement, we knew that it was all in Heavenly Father’s hands.

Tell us how you were chosen and how it felt. Fears? Excitement?

We started with just emailing back and forth for a few weeks with Mindy, Rachel’s birth mother. One day we got an email that asked if we would call her. When we did, she told us she had chosen us to be her little girl’s parents! She lived in Colorado (we’re in Utah) and wanted to make her decision before having an in person meeting. We were not expecting it and were so excited and surprised that it actually took a couple of days to sink in. We felt like we already knew her, so we didn’t really have any worries or fears, it was just pure excitement! When we did get to meet her shortly after, it just confirmed what we all were feeling and progressed naturally from there.

Tell us all about when you met your child’s birth parents for the first time.

We thought it would be really nerve-racking to meet Mindy for the first time, and we were really nervous, but as soon as we saw her, we just felt like we already knew her and gave her a big hug. There was never any nervousness or fear after that.
We didn’t get the opportunity to meet Rachel’s birth father, Ben, until Rachel was a few months old, but it seemed like they knew each other, and it was a really neat experience.

What gifts did you give your child’s birth parents?

We wanted to do something really special for Mindy on the placement day, and thought about it a lot beforehand. We bought two identical teddy bears (and took like an hour to pick them out!), and gave one to Mindy and kept one for Rachel (her “Mindy Bear”). We wrote a poem to go along with the bears, about how any time Mindy sees her bear, she can know that we’re thinking about her, and that she is always connected to and loved by Rachel and us. I (Mary) read the poem to her in the hospital right before placement, and it was hard to read through the tears.
What thoughts, fears, and feelings did you have before placement?

We had come to know and love Mindy and her family so well that one of the main feelings we had was sadness for her. She had told us many times that even though it was hard, she knew she was doing the right thing, but it was still a very hard time. It’s also hard because even though we felt very confident that the placement would happen, there was always that fear in the back of our minds that Mindy would change her mind. But as it got closer, we were just SO excited that this day had finally come, after 5 years of waiting, hoping, and praying to be parents.

Tell us about your placement experience. Was it everything you dreamed it to be? Was it a hard or easy, spiritual?

Placement was the most unique experience we have ever been through. We thought it would be awkward and didn’t really know what to expect. We were so surprised at how incredibly spiritual of an experience it was – honestly one of the most spiritual times we have ever had. We stood waiting in the hallway of the hospital while Mindy, with her family beside her, signed the relinquishment papers, and our hearts were breaking for her and we also felt so nervous. But once they were finished and we were in the room with them, everyone was just overcome with so many emotions. We all knew that God was guiding and helping us all. There were a lot of tears, but there was also so much love between us all, and even some laughter, if you can believe that! Then Mindy and her family left, and Rachel was really coming home with us. We were in shock. I (Mary) remember thinking as we walked out of the hospital with Rachel that it just felt SO surreal. And so wonderful.

How did you feel after bringing your child home for the first time?

Since we had an out of state adoption, we had to stay in Colorado until we had clearance to leave the state, so we lived in a hotel room with our brand new baby for the first week of her life. On the one hand, we were anxious to get home, but it was also kind of neat to be able to just be together and enjoy her all to ourselves. Another thing that was great about it was that we went and visited Mindy almost every day between placement and when we went home, so it didn’t feel like she was saying goodbye forever at placement.

We were also very new to having a newborn, and exhausted! They say that formula fed babies go longer in between feedings. They lie! She was up every 2 hours on the dot! But we couldn’t get enough of her. One of the first nights, Mike got up with her in the dead of night, and just sat on the floor recording her with the video camera, falling in love with her.
What feelings did you have at finalization? What happened (the court experience)?

Honestly, the finalization felt like a technicality, because Rachel already felt like she was our daughter all along, although it still was a very special day. We had contacted a lawyer who was referred to us several months before, and had the date planned out way in advance. We loved our caseworker and our lawyer, and the judge was really nice and said how he loved doing adoptions. They asked us questions about how we felt about Rachel and if we were willing and able to provide a good home for her. It felt kind of silly, almost, answering the questions, because there was no question in our minds that she was loved and would always be.

Tell us as much as you are comfortable with about your child being sealed to you; feelings, the ceremony, thoughts?

The day of our daughter’s sealing was so special. We had a lot of family and friends there to share it with us. Rachel looked so beautiful in her white dress, and Mike and I both had tears in our eyes as she was sealed to our family. We feel so blessed that she’s part of our family forever, and can’t imagine life, or eternity, without her. The next day we had her baby blessing at church, and that was incredible too.

What is your relationship like with the birth parents? Has it changed?

We have a very close relationship with Rachel’s birth mother, Mindy. We’ve always just felt like she was family. Mindy’s mom has said that she doesn’t feel like we adopted Rachel, she feels like their family adopted us. It’s been two years since we adopted Rachel and we still talk and visit all the time. I think our relationship will only get stronger as time goes on, and we love that.
We have a less open relationship with Rachel’s birth father. He has met Rachel a couple of times, and we are open to seeing more of him and his family, but there just hasn’t been as much contact on his end, although we still say hi occasionally, and we send him pictures.

How have your feelings changed about adoption since you first started the process? How has adoption affected your life, good or bad?

When we first began thinking about and pursuing adoption, we really didn’t know much about it. Now, adoption is a big part of our lives, and we’re glad it is. We don’t try to hide the fact that our daughter was adopted – it’s an important part of who she is. We love talking to people about adoption, and most people like to hear a lot about it because it’s not extremely common or talked about. Adoption has blessed our lives beyond measure. Our family would be incomplete without it.
What hopes and dreams do you have for your child? How do you plan on discussing adoption with your child? Do you have any concerns or fears in raising a child who is adopted?

I think we have the same hopes and dreams for our daughter that any parent has – that she’ll grow up happy and healthy and have a strong testimony of her Savior and Heavenly Father. Concerning adoption, we hope that she will always know and love her birth parents and understand their sacrifice and deep love for her. We talk about them often and hope it will just be a natural part of her life. It’s the same way with knowing she’s adopted – it will simply be something that she knows her entire life, and that she can talk to us, or her birth parents, about at any time. The only fear I think we might have is if people say insensitive things to her about adoption later in her life. But we hope that she will have such an understanding and appreciation of adoption that she’ll be able to not let those things affect her.

Thanks for taking the time to read about us and our story. We’re hoping to grow our family again through adoption and have another wonderful and exciting journey.

-Mike, Mary, and Rachel
www.mike-and-mary.com

Once Upon A Time...Mike and Brianne's Story

2010-06-24T22:03:00.000-07:00

Mike and I met in Cedar City, Utah as we were going to college at SUU. Mike was one of the first people I met as I moved to Cedar City and instantly we were friends. I have to admit I had a major crush on him and his outgoing and funny personality but we stayed at friend status for two years. We dated other people and would give each other dating advice. We did go on some dates, but I always considered myself his back-up date because he would ask all the other cute girls out before he would resort to me, his good buddy. I was o.k. with that! The romance started when as cheesy as this is, we became Family Home Evening Mom and Dad (yes this is an actual calling if you have never been in a singles ward :). I started noticing Mike’s amazing qualities and my crush grew into imagining us married and liking what I imagined. One night I was at Mike’s house with his sister Angela; we were all sitting around the kitchen table talking and the topic of dating came up. I of course was thinking, “I would love for Mike to be my boyfriend”, and at that same moment Angela, Mike’s sister, said, “Why don’t you two start dating? I’ve always thought you would be an amazing couple”? Mike and I just stared at each other for a moment looking for each other’s response and when I didn’t knock the idea down, Mike got really excited and said, “We should”! Two short months later we were engaged.

Before we had gotten serious as a couple I had planned a trip to Wuhan, China to teach English to children and although I would be gone for six months we both decided I should still go, even though it would be hard being apart from one another. I left for China one month after our engagement and Mike likes to say he proposed and then I fled the country! It was hard being away from each other, but I can only think of three times in my lifetime where I was as excited to see Mike as the day I returned home from China! It felt like home to be with him! One month after I returned home from China we were married in the Salt Lake City Temple and I was equally excited that day to marry Mike, my eternal companion.

We had been married for about two years when we started seeing doctors to figure out why were weren’t able to get pregnant. It turned out that both of us had severe fertility problems. I always knew growing up I would have difficulty getting pregnant, but when we found out Mike also had problems, we were devastated and unprepared for the news. We had discussed adoption before getting married and we had both mutually agreed that even if we could get pregnant we would still want to adopt, so when we got the news we instantly made an appointment with a fertility doctor and started on our adoption paperwork. After visiting with the fertility doctor and finding out our only possible way of getting pregnant was to do Invitro Fertilization and knowing how expensive this procedure was, we put a hold on our adoption paperwork and started saving money. We sold cars, fourwheelers, were as conservative as possible and even at one point moved in with my parents to save as much money as we could for this procedure. Finally, after three years of saving we had enough money to pay for Invitro.

Invitro was a painful, complicated and difficult process. There were shots every day for months, frequent doctor visits, multiple surgeries and emotional ups and downs not knowing if the procedure would work after three years of saving. However, the pain was absolutely worth it when we got the amazing news that we were pregnant with twins! Words cannot express the joy we felt as we received the news! The first trimester went by without a problem and as soon as the first trimester was over we felt like we had made it through the scariest part of the pregnancy and felt confident our babies would get to us safely. At 20 weeks we found out we were going to have a boy and a girl and the pregnancy looked like it was progressing normally! It was just what we wanted and hoped for! We were relieved and excited! I remember telling a friend that things seemed like they were too good to be true because we were getting everything we had ever dreamed of having. I was painfully right. One week after our ultrasound my water broke and I was rushed to the hospital. Our daughter Brynlee came November 10, 2009, lived for 5 minutes and passed away in our arms. Our son Camden came November 13, 2009, lived for 10 minutes and also passed away in our arms. They were perfectly formed babies, just very small. They were so sweet and so beautiful. They will forever have a place in our hearts. Time heals, but this has left a scar. Healing completely would mean forgetting them and that is not something we want.

Grief is an odd emotion because it’s every emotion. I have felt anger toward God and anyone in my line of sight, relief that our children will forever be perfect, total despair in not knowing if I will ever experience pregnancy again, confusion with what direction in which to take our lives, jealousy toward other women who seem to waltz through pregnancy like it’s a game, hate toward people who were happy when I was feeling so much pain and moments of joy as this experience forged our relationship as a couple. It has now been 7 months since we lost our beautiful babies and I’m not going to lie and say that I do not feel the scariest of these emotion because I do on occasion, but it’s different now. At first, I felt every emotion everyday, but as the weeks and months have gone by the negative emotions are slowly fading and I hope one day to look back on these events and think, oh, that’s why we had to go through this trial!

We decided to once again start the adoption process through LDS Family Services in January, 2010 and although there was a lot of paperwork to complete it was very healing knowing we were one step closer to finding the child who is meant to come to our family. We feel in our hearts there is a woman somewhere who will grant us the privilege to be the adoptive parents of her son or daughter, but until then we will continue to heal and progress. We have a very good social worker who we instantly felt comfortable with and we trust she will do what she can to help us through this process. We are scared and nervous this could lead to another heart break, but just like Invitro, all the pain will be worth it if it means finding the child who is meant to be in our family.

We are optimistic for the future and try to remember the blessings we share as a couple. Life is a tough journey, but like I have said before…It will all be worth it in the end if we can stay strong and trust that God has a plan for us!

Case Worker Spotlight

2010-06-08T08:32:00.000-07:00

Here is a fun post about another one of our fantastic case workers Kim Perry. I hope you enjoy getting to know her as much as I did.

What type of activities do you enjoy in your spare time?

I love being outside. I love water sports, traveling, and just hanging out in the yard with my husband Devin and my 19 month old daughter, Hallie. I love baseball and have been a lifetime fan of the Atlanta Braves. I enjoy going out with my husband, though at the present time, our schedules rarely allow that. I love to read and blog when I have extra time. I am taking up bike riding (sort of) and have a goal to ride around town to do errands as much as possible.

Share something unique about yourself

I am still a kid at heart. I love to have fun, even if it not seen a socially acceptable for someone my age. I love to go have girls nights with friends or my mom, sisters, and cousins. I recently had a slumber party with four of the girls that I graduated with from BYU in the Social Work program. Had you been there, you definitely would not have thought of us as "professionals."

What is your favorite day of the week?

My favorite day of the week is probably Saturday. At the current time, that is about the only day I see my husband for a long period of time since he doesn't have to go to work until later in the evening. We get projects done around the house or spend time as a family, which I love. Favorite time of the day is probably night. I am a night owl. I hate mornings.

How long have you been a case worker?

I have been a caseworker for two years this month (June). I was hired right after I graduated with my bachelor's degree from BYU. I have loved (nearly) every minute!

What helped you to decide to become a case worker?

I had a goal to work for LDS Family Services from the time I was in high school. I have always just had a soft spot for social work. I worked with developmentally delayed children in high school and loved it. I debated between special education and social work for a while but chose social work because I thought that my personal talents were more geared toward that.

Why did you choose to serve in the field of adoption?

As for working in adoption specifically, well, I had a life changing experience when I went to Ecuador my sophomore year of college to work in the orphanages for 3 months there. I loved it so much I came home for about 5 months and then had to go back. This experience alone not only shaped my life but cemented the goals that I had to work in adoption. Though obviously different because we don't deal with international adoption, I learned in Ecuador that the Lord has a hand in everything and that despite my limited understanding of everything, He loves each of his children individually and has a specific plan for them.

Have you had any experience with adoption before you became a case worker?

In Ecuador I saw some children get adopted, though not very many. The country has a lot of different laws than we do and there was an incredible amount of "red tape" to get the orphans adopted. Most families who adopted children while I was there had to wait around 2 years before they could even take their child home. No newborns were adopted. It was also more difficult for people outside of their country to adopt there. I didn't understand why they seemed to prefer to have their children grow up in an orphanage rather than relax some of the laws to allow more to be adopted. I guess I will never understand.

I also have an aunt who is adopted who I am close to. Things were done differently back then and my grandparents were called and told that there was a newborn waiting to be picked up if they could provide her a home. She came home and became my mom's youngest sister, the youngest of 9 children. She doesn't speak much about her adoption and knows little about her birth parents, if anything. We all knew she was adopted growing up, but that didn't make any difference to us because we loved her just the same. She is as much a part of the family as anyone and it is easy to forget that she was adopted.

Share an experience that surprised you while working as an adoption case worker?

Everything surprises me in this job! I really had different expectations when I started this job. I guess the biggest thing that I didn't anticipate is the age of our birth mothers. I haven't had any birth mothers place who are younger than 18. Every relinquishment that I have been a part of, the birth mothers are older than 18. Interesting. I have worked with many birth moms in their 30's.

Share a spiritual/memorable experience while working as an adoption case worker

I love Face to Face meetings, Placements, and Supervision visits. These are often the most spiritual in nature. The Face to Face...so often you can just tell it is right, the Spirit is so strong. Placements again, though heart wrenching on one side, are miraculous to be a part of and it is amazing to just feel the warmth there, again testifying that an eternal family is being created. Supervisions are exciting because you get to see a family interacting with their child and telling how much they love this baby and how much they know that this child was meant for their family. It is so satisfying to see a family who was in so much pain before now on the other side telling me how much they can see the hand of the Lord in their lives, though they may have questioned before when their child might come to them. I love having them say that the wait, however long, was worth it for this child.

Birth Mother's Day and Walk

2010-06-03T15:41:00.000-07:00

The Saturday before Mother's Day we came together in honor of birth mothers and to celebrate adoption! We had a very successful event with people from all over the state of Utah. We had an AMAZING turn out and we can't wait to do it again next year! Thank you to EVERYONE who helped out with this years walk. Thank you to all who came and supported us in such a wonderful cause. We all LOVE our sweet birth mothers and we will always honor them on their day because if it wasn't for their selfless love and sacrifice we wouldn't be parents.

(Click on the pictures below to make them bigger)

IN HONOR OF

BIRTH PARENTS

FAMILY

FRIENDS

PARACHUTE AND CANDY LAUNCHER

COSMO

PROVO FIRE DEPARMENT

RACES

Until next year.......

FSA National Conference Registration is NOW OPEN!!!

2010-05-25T01:01:00.001-07:00

Please take a moment to go and register for the 2010 FSA Adoption Conference. The conference will be Friday July 30th and Saturday July 31st.

This conference is for anyone who is involved in adoption. There are classes for EVERYONE!

Considering adoption
Working on your adoption paper work and porfile
Trying to find your baby
Have recently adopted
Have adopted several years ago
Considered foster care,
Have adopted interacialy
Have questions on how to raise your children,
Have questions about how to answer your children's questions,
Interested in how to have a positive relationship with your child's birth parents

Check out the classes HERE

TO REGISTER GO HERE

They will be offering on-site childcare will be open both days during the banquet to those who have pre-registered. The cost is $10 per day, per child.

THIS IS AN EVENT THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS!!!

FSA National Conference Service Projects

2010-05-20T22:59:00.000-07:00

Hopefully you have reserved July 30th & 31st on your summer calendars for the National FSA Conference. This year there will be a couple of service projects that they are inviting everyone who is attending the conference to join in on. Please take a moment to check them out so YOU can participate in these great projects.

National Conferece Service Project

The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.

~Mohandas Ghandi

This year Families Supporting Adoption will be hosting a service project at the annual conference. Collection baskets will be set up for conference participants to have the opportunity to serve two great organizations in collecting items that they are in need of. Please bring your donations with you to the conference.

The first organization we will be collecting items for is Birth Mother Baskets.

Birth Mother Baskets is a non-profit organization started by Gina Crotts. Gina is a birth mother and refers to the daughter she placed as her "little butterfly." In an effort to give back to the adoption community and serve other women who have placed and may need some additional love, Gina created Birth Mother Baskets. Donated items are arranged into beautiful baskets and sent to birth mothers in need. We are honored to be part of her cause this year.

Items that we would love to collect for Birth Mother Baskets include:

Journals
Lotions
Bath Salts
Bath Bubbles
Movies
Jewelry
8 x 10 or 5 x 7 photo frame
Music CD's
Inspirational Books
Hair Products
Make-Up
Fingernail Polish
Manicure/Pedicure Sets
Photo Albums
Magazines
Small Blankets
Slippers
Stuffed Animals
Gift Certificates (Massages, spa treatments, pedicure, manicure, movies or book store ect.)
Large Baskets (Gina recommends laundry sized wicker baskets at Wal-Mart for only $4.00)
Tissue Paper
Ribbons
Candles

We will also be collecting school supplies for The Christmas Box International.

The friendly environment of the Christmas Box Houses are unique. Children are brought into the shelter program after being removed from their homes because of abuse, neglect, or abandonment. Instead of spending the night in loss comfortable circumstances, they are able to arrive at the House were the staff is immediately available to talk to children and explain what is happening, what will happen, and why. The House staff provide a sense of caring, warmth and continuity at a very difficult time in a child's life.

Currently there are three Christmas Box Houses located in the state of Utah -- in the cities of Salt Lake City, Ogden, and Moab. The Houses all have the basic concept of a child-friendly, calm, home-like atmosphere and have added programs and services to meet the unique needs of the children in the communities they serve.

School supplies that we would love to collect for The Christmas Box House include:

-#2 Pencils

-Glue Sticks

-Backpacks

- Box of Tissues

- Pink Eraser

- Broad Tip Markers

- Pair of Scissors

- Pencil Case

- Wide-Ruled Spiral Bound Notebooks

- Pocket Folders

-Crayons

-Pkg. Wide Ruled Loose Lead Paper

Day 6 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

2010-05-08T00:28:00.001-07:00

Kelley's Story

Being a birth mom is the most amazing privilege and means a lot to me. I was able to give a couple an eternal gift and give Grace an eternal family. I knew within my heart that this little girl belonged to her adopted parents when I read their profile. I couldn't have asked for a better life for both of us. I love her so much!

I got married about a year after Grace was placed and in January of 2009, we went into labor with our first baby together. We were induced at 31 weeks. Our angel Elizabeth capri was born with hydrops fetalis which prevented her lungs from expanding and growing like they needed to. After two days of seeing her in pain and seeing her crying but never hearing her cry, we prayerfully decided to take her off of her life support. It was so hard for me. I had wanted a girl my whole life and there I was feeling like I was losing my second daughter. 3 short months later we found ourselves pregnant again. In December we had kayson. I absolutely LOVE being a mom. I've waited almost three years for him to come. I still miss both of my girls but they are both in better places. I love being a birth mother and I hold that title very close to my heart.

Day 5 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

2010-05-06T23:37:00.000-07:00

Stacie's Story

The first words that come to mind when I think of the word birth mom: Gratitude and Blessings!

I can't encourage adoption enough. Being a birth mom has changed my life completely in ways I never knew. When people tell you its the most selfless act and you will be blessed, take it to heart because its true. Since I chose to place my son my life has been abundantly restored with happiness, peace and comfort.

I can truly say I am one of the luckiest women on this planet! The way I found my son's adoptive family was so meant to be. Not only did I find the Mom who I always wanted to be, but also the dad I prayed for my son to have. They are absolutely amazing and words cannot describe how great they really are. We have an open adoption. I speak to the adoptive mom almost on a weekly basis and we talk as if she is the best friend anyone can have. She is understanding, loving and so supportive of where I came from at that point in my life.

About a year and a half ago at the age of 28 thinking I had my life together, I found myself pregnant and single. I had dated the birth father for 2 years when things just didnt turn out the way I thought they would. I felt from day one that this little guy wasn't meant for me. I fought my feelings over and over and found myself kneeling daily in tears, praying God would give me the answer. Prayers ARE answered if we are patient and listen. I wasn't living the right life to bring a little baby into this world and pretend that it was all going to work out. There was another plan...

Over the remaining months of my pregnancy I spoke to my son and explained that there was a plan for him and I was going to give him the family he deserved and that they will love him unconditionally just like I do. It worked out PERFECT. When you meet the family, you just know when its right. Anyone who tells you it's easy is lying, but I love waking up everyday knowing I made the right choice. My life now is better than I ever thought it could be and I will never forget the day I brought him into this world and gave him to the family he was meant to be with. He will forever be blessed and live the life I just couldnt give him all because I was chosen to be his birth mom and gave him the family that was patiently waiting for him.

If you have any comments about the articles or you would like to write something to any of the birth mothers please feel free to e-mail provofsa@gmail.com Let these birth mothers know how amazing they are! Feel free to write and tell them.

Families Supporting Adoption Walk THIS SATURDAY!!!

2010-05-06T23:23:00.000-07:00

If you have enjoyed reading about these sweet birth mothers and their stories some of them will be at the adoption walk THIS Saturday May 8th (which is birth mothers day) at the Provo High School track at 10:00am for our 3rd annual Families Supporting Adoption walk! This is a great opportunity to meet other couples and families involved in the adoption process. This year's walk will feature a visit from the Provo Fire Department, and Cosmo. Likewise, we will have games, donuts and of course, candy for the kids. Please come out to celebrate Birthmothers and the miracle of adoption.

Make sure you arrive early there will be a fire truck there from 10:00-11:00! We hope to see you there!!

Day 4 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

2010-05-05T23:56:00.001-07:00

Kristi's Story

What does being a birth mother mean to me? WOW!! I will try to put my feelings into words best as possible. I am the luckiest birth mother in the world. I never knew the hardest thing I've done in my life (which was to place my little girl 3 1/2 years ago) could have been the BEST thing that I've EVER done. She has the been the joy that turned my life right side up and I will forever be grateful to her. As I reflect on the years and all that I've been through since I've had her, I am so lucky I had the strength in myself, and that my family and friends believed in me and helped me along the way as well. Kesley has not only touched and helped my life, but hundreds of others as well. Every time I have the opportunity to share my story I get so excited and someone without fail has an experience to share or question to ask. What a great way to give back to Adoption.

From the day I found out that I was pregnant and not married, I knew that it was my little girls life that was the #1 concern. What is BEST for her? She deserved to be raised by both a mom and dad and let me emphasize that she has the most AMAZING parents in the world who adopted her. She couldn't be luckier if she wanted to be. Kesley is loved by everyone around her and she brings so much joy into her families lives and mine as well and THAT is one of the greatest joys of being a birth mother, being able to see the LOVE she receives. The day of placement was the hardest day I've ever had, but bitter sweet because I knew she was going to the home that she was brought to this earth for and I can say a thousand times over that she was MEANT to be in the family she's in and that is another reason being a birth mother is so amazing, no regrets!

Being a birth mother has changed my life completely. I find myself more loving, understanding, none judgmental, and at peace in my life with being able to trust myself and all around a better person. Placing a child is a huge decision, but after all is said and done to see how the puzzle pieces fit perfectly together is a miracle. I am lucky to have learned the things I've learned by being a birth mother and am especially lucky to have such a great relationship with her family and to be apart of that MIRACLE!

Every time I see Kesley she gets so excited! I get a HUGE smile and hug from her, and that to this day is one the greatest gift of being a birth mother. I'm excited for the future and what it brings because I know that everyone who is involved in our Miracle will only become closer! I'm excited to see Kesley conquer the world with her personality and smile! But...

The BEST part of being a Birth Mother is being able to Bless a Family's life!

If you have any comments about the articles or you would like to write something to any of the birth mothers please feel free to e-mail provofsa@gmail.com Let these birth mothers know how amazing they are! Feel free to write and tell them.

Day 3 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

2010-05-05T09:02:00.000-07:00

Tera's Story

What does being a birth mom mean to me? Sounds like such a simple question, yet has such a complex and meaningful answer. It is so near and dear to my heart and such an important part of who I am, that it is hard to thoroughly explain what it means to me. To start let me simply say that it is an honor and I am so proud of how I have handled a difficult situation of being single and pregnant. I am the lucky birth mom to James, the most adorable, handsome, kind hearted, independent, smart, loving and best little brother (I can go on and on about him). He was born July 31, 2007, and I placed him three days later into his loving family. I am proud to say that I am his birth mom because I know that I made the right decision for the most precious person in the world and I know that he will grow up knowing exactly how much I love him and he was truly placed out of love.

Having the opportunity to be a birth mom has affected my life in so many ways. Through the process of discovering I was pregnant, deciding whether I should keep or place, finding a family, giving birth, experiencing placement and just being single and pregnant; I have discovered that I am much stronger than I ever thought I could be, and that I can do hard things. I have nothing but positive experiences with adoption. I loved being pregnant, I loved my case worker, I love the amazing family I chose for my precious boy, and the continuing relationship that I have with them. Do not get me wrong; it was the most difficult thing I have ever gone through, and hopefully ever will have to experience. I had many sleepless nights, tearful and sobbing moments and sometimes days, unimaginable heartache, and have never felt so alone in my life. But through it all, I have become a better person, and through it all I have decided to become an adoption case worker myself and am currently getting my Masters in order to make that happen. I have been blessed to be able to participate in promoting adoption locally and participating in adoption conferences as well. By participating in these things, it is confirmed that I made the best decision and that I should be proud of being a birth mom. Although some may not understand the decision I made, or even begin to comprehend the things that I have gone through, it has provided opportunities for me to educate others about the benefits of adoption and everyone involved.

Overall, these are some of things that I love about being a birth mom: having an open adoption, being able to see James when it allows (about 2 – 3 times a year), getting to know his entire family (and discovering that James’ mom and I have a lot in common), receiving picture-texts of James on his super adorable days, being able to take credit for him, although I am not the one raising him and teaching him the important lessons and qualities that will help him become the amazing young man I know he will become. Being a birth mom has changed my life, I have learned so many things about myself, and have met so many amazing people. I am proud to have the title of a birth mom, and carry that with honor.

If you have any comments about the articles or you would like to write something to any of the birth mothers please feel free to e-mail provofsa@gmail.com Let these birth mothers know how amazing they are! Feel free to write and tell them.

Day 2 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

2010-05-04T09:18:00.000-07:00

Ashli's Story

Being a birth mother means so much to me and has been such a positive experience in my life. I have grown as a person and have realized what is important. When I found out I was going to be a single parent, I decided to look more into adoption. I wanted to keep my options open and make the best decision for my child. The reason I chose adoption was because I knew I couldn't give my baby the best life he deserved. I wanted him to have both a mom and a dad who could give him everything I couldn't. It was very important to me that he was sealed to a family and had the gospel in his life. I knew I had to put my selfish feelings aside and think about the baby. I loved him enough to give him a better life. Deciding to place my baby for adoption was the hardest decision I have ever made, but the best thing I could have done for him.

I have a very open adoption. I have an awesome relationship with the baby I placed and his family. I love the openness and I'm so grateful that his family has allowed me to still have a relationship with him. Every time I see him, I am reminded that he has such an amazing life. A life I couldn't have given him. His family loves him so much! I love him so much and I feel so blessed to be his birth mother. I know he will understand and know how much I love him as we continue to have a relationship. Adoption is amazing and has made me a better person. It's amazing how a birth mother and an adoptive couple can be an answer to each others prayers in two totally different ways.

When I hear the word birth mother, I feel a mixture of emotions. The song "From God's arms, to my arms, to yours" by Michael McLean, is a good way to describe the way a birth mother feels. The song is about a birth mother who is talking to the adoptive mom. She explains the emotions she goes through as she chooses adoption and how she feels deep within her heart that her unborn child belongs to their family. She asks the adoptive mom to tell the child how much she loves him. A few lines of the song that describe a birth mother's emotions are "If you chose to tell him, if he wants to know, how the one who gave him life could bear to let him go. Just tell him there were sleepless nights I prayed and paced the floors, And knew the only peace I'd find, was if this child was yours. And maybe, you could tell your baby, when you love him so that he's been loved before. By someone who delivered your son, From God's arms, to my arms, to yours. I'm just trusting in my feelings, and I'm trusting God above, And I'm trusting you can give this baby, both his mothers' Love."

Birth mothers love the children they place for adoption. Even though I miss him and think of him everyday, I wouldn't go back and change anything because he is where he is supposed to be and has a wonderful life.

Day 1 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

2010-05-03T09:13:00.001-07:00

Paige's Story

The word Birthmother doesn’t mean much to just the normal person on the street. To me it has a significant meaning. Sometimes I say that I was just an instrument in God’s hands to deliver a child to a family who could not have their own. I am truly blessed to be a Birthmother; it is one of the most precious things in the world. Not only did I bring a beautiful boy into this world but I also gave him a family I couldn’t give him. My adoption is far from perfect and promises broken but I wouldn’t change it for the world. I remember the first part of the grieving process; it was only a couple days after placement, just thinking what have I done? I was in so much emotional pain that I wanted to take my decision back. I would just lay in bed with my whole body just aching, feeling like there was nothing left for me to live for. I wanted my little boy back. We are like soldiers. We are wounded in a battle where we are trying to make a better life for someone else. We will always have the emptiness in our heart that wants to be filled. We will always wonder what that child is doing every single day. It was like getting my heart ripped out of my chest and having people tell me to just move on. How can a body live without a heart? That’s what I felt like without my baby. I try to look back on those few months after He was born and it is very blurry. I know my Heavenly Father carried me through those first couple months; I was not there alone nor am I now. All the promises my adoptive couple made to me were gone as soon as they got that precious child into their arms. They didn’t remember me or how they got there first son. I did not receive a single picture or letter for the first three months of his life and that killed me. During this time I remember being so hurt and betrayed. Not only did they not care about me but they took every part of me that was worth living for. Months were bumpy from then on and still are. Promises are still broken frequently and I have learned to not trust in everything they say. I struggle with it some days but being almost four years down the road I can look back and realize it was a miracle that things worked out the way they are.

Four year ago I would have never dreamed of something like this being a part of my life. Adoption was one of the hardest things I have ever experienced in my life and it is definitely something I would not wish on my worst enemy. But I am privileged to still have a relationship with my little boy. I don’t see him as much as was promised before he was born but I still see him about three times a year. Those times are the most fulfilling in my life. I get to see his little personality shine through and warm so many lives! He will look at me sometimes like “I know you somehow” but just can’t quite figure it out. He is not old enough to understand who I am yet so to him I am just Paige. But he calls my parents grandma and grandpa and my sister and brother aunt and uncle. I strive to be a better person because of that little boy that came into my life. I know he wouldn’t want me to be miserable and not doing anything with myself. I can’t wait for the day until he is old enough to realize what a Birth mother is to him and how much his Birthmother loves him.

I have met a lot of adoptive couples and I realize that not all of them tell their birth mom only what they want to hear. Most are genuinely sincere and I wonder to myself WHY did I have to feel so strongly about the couple I chose that has put me through more heartache than needs be? I have found my answer, God knows me and knows what I can and can’t handle and for some reason he knew I could handle the pain and heartache and learn from this experience. Boston is meant to be in their family, He just had a different route in getting there. Maybe just maybe there is more to the story than that, maybe there is more learning to come when I go to start my own family. Or maybe it is as simple to where I need to share my story to other adoptive parents. To show them that we as birth mothers hang on their every letter, picture, phone call or email. We really live for every ounce of communication we have with our children that are now your family

“Time does not heal all wounds; time just lessens the pain we feel from those wounds.”

If you have any comments about the articles or you would like to write something to any of the birth mothers please feel free to e-mail provofsa@gmail.com Let these birth mothers know how amazing they are! Feel free to write and tell them.

Birth Mother's Week!!!

2010-05-03T09:00:00.000-07:00

Since Birth Mother's Day is this Saturday I thought I would make it birth mothers week and feature a article a day from a different birth mother each day. I have asked several birth mothers to write what being a birth mothers means to them. They all have different stories and different experiences with adoption. They all have different views and relationships with the children they placed.

They all have the same story .... they all loved their children enough to educate themselves and to choose adoption for their child. They all did an incredibly selfless act and have a huge amount of love for their children. Each has placed their children into the arms of an adoptive couple and had complete faith that their child would be taken care of. Each of them have cried MANY tears for their children some happy but many sad. These girls are courageous woman who put someone else before their own needs because of love.

Please enjoy reading what they have to say about what it's like being a birth mother. I HOPE you enjoy them as much as I have.

CHECK BACK EACH DAY FOR A NEW BIRTH MOTHER ARTICLE THIS WEEK!!!

If you have adopted and you have a open adoption with your child's birth mother PLEASE take the time to do something for them if it be a e-mail, a letter, sending pictures or a package to them to let them know how much you appreciate everything they have given your family and your child. Let them know how loved they are this Saturday as we celebrate Birth Mother's Day.

If you have any comments about the articles or you would like to write something to any of the birth mothers please feel free to e-mail provofsa@gmail.com

Once Upon A Time....Scott and Amy's story

2010-04-26T20:53:00.000-07:00

We meet online at LDSsingles.com. Scott was living in Orem and Amy was in Idaho Falls and so we were grateful that technology brought us together. We instant messaged and talked on the phone before deciding that we did like each other and probably should meet. For our first date Amy came to Utah and we went to a BYU basketball game. The rest is history… we are still attending BYU basketball games six years later, but now with little Olivia who joined our family in February 2009 through the miracle of adoption.  

We always talked about having a family and really never thought that we would be unable to have one in the traditionally way. We tried for three and half years on our own (with some medical intervention) without any success. Adoption was the next step.

The process was more extensive and took longer than we expected. We were not impressed with the first agency we started with. Our counselor was not responsive and did not appear to be our advocate in the process. This was very frustrating because we felt like this was the direction that we were supposed to be moving in, but nothing was happening.

About a year after we started the adoption process a friend of Amy’s from high school saw on our blog that we were trying to adopt and sent her an e-mail about an agency that was looking for a family for a set of African American twins. We immediately went to this agency’s web site and saw that they had four or five babies that needed families and the average wait time was only one-three months. The next day we called that agency, sent them our paperwork, and with in two weeks we received “the call”. Our birth mom asked the agency to choose a nice family for her baby. We must have looked nice because they chose us! We found out on a Friday that there was a baby in Louisiana due in approximately three weeks that needed a good home and we had been chosen. The following Tuesday we got a call that she was coming and to get to Louisiana as soon as possible. We met Olivia for the first time that evening and immediately fell in love with her. We think Heavenly Father knew that we couldn’t wait any longer and sent Olivia just a few weeks early for us.

We meet our daughter's birth mom in Louisiana and continue to have a semi-open relationship. We send pictures and letters on Christmas and Olivia’s birthday. In addition, we have a family blog that she has access to. We know very little about her birth father.

Olivia is African American and one of our biggest concerns about adopting someone of a different race is how she would be accepted by our family and friends. In addition, we worried about how a child would be treated in school, church, etc. We have been pleasantly surprised about how accepting everyone has been. We get stopped regularly in stores by complete strangers who have to say Hi because they have a family member who has adopted an African American child or they have a friend of a friend who has adopted. Unfortunately we have seen that racism still exists. We have one family member with whom we do not associate with now because of Olivia’s race, which has been very difficult to accept. We have to remind ourselves that it is this person’s loss because they will never meet this amazing little girl.

Olivia is now a little over a year and we ask ourselves constantly what we did before she joined our family. On the day she was sealed to us Scott gave her amazing blessing in which he told her that he knew that she chose to come to our family. We are so grateful for this little spirit in our home and are so lucky to be her parents.  

Temple Night this Tuesday

2010-04-19T00:53:00.000-07:00

This is ia reminder that we have Temple Night this Tuesday at 7:00pm. We will be meeting at the sealing office at the Provo temple. We have the opportunity to participate in temple sealing's. EVERYONE is invited! If you are able to come PLEASE RSVP to Lisa at lisa.broberg25@gmail.com.

Provo FSA video

2010-04-19T00:29:00.000-07:00

One of our awesome board members Dave Broberg created this video to share with others what FSA (Families Supporting Adoption) is all about. I thought it would be a great idea to share it with all of you.

We are always in need of people who support adoption and want to spread the good word of adoption. We would love to have you! If you are interested in being involved with FSA or receiving e-mails about activites please send an e-mail to provofsa@gmail.com.

Once Upon A Time.... Bob and Colista's story

2010-04-12T09:51:00.000-07:00

Bob and I met by chance. One day while I was visiting my brother I went into a chat room just to chat with him. You have to know my brother, he is big into computers and I knew this would be the only way to talk to him. At the same time my husband finally gave into peer pressure and went into the same chat room. After chatting with my brother online and watching all these people chatting with each other, it was like a different world, I clicked OK on the box when my to-be husband asked to chat with me. We didn’t exchange personal information for a long time but did have fun chatting. After a year of chatting and then finally dating we were married.

Bob considers Michigan home. His father was in the army so they were fortunate to be able to live in many states and my husband was born in Germany. My family is from the warm state of Arizona. My dad still owns the house I was raised in so it is a foreign idea to me to move every 2 or 3 years. Bob is the second of four boys and I am the oldest of three girls and one boy.

We were married in 2000 and had discussed adoption and foster care while we were dating. While I was in high school I had decided that I wanted to adopt children and provide foster care for as many children as I could so when we found out we would need to adopt our children we weren’t upset or disappointed. I researched many different adoption organizations and received a lot of information in the mail.

In 2005 we started the process to become licensed foster parents. It was a lot of work to become licensed but the classes you are required to take prepare you for a lot of things that may arise with any child; biological, adopted, or foster. The only fear we had with foster care was how much it would hurt to have a child in your home, love them as a part of your family, and then return home to their parents. And after having our first placement in 2006 of three beautiful sisters and seeing them return home to their family we learned just how much it does hurt. It was worth it though. We learned a lot and knew that we could do it again. After all, it’s not about us, it’s about the children.

In the beginning of summer 2006 I had this feeling that we should try to adopt through LDS Family Services. I still had a mountain of paperwork from various adoption agencies but we still had not investigated LDSFS. Bob and I discussed it and took the introductory class and headed home with all the paperwork that needed to be filled out. It wasn’t as much as is required for foster care but it was still a lot. The birth parent letter and photo collage seemed a little scary to me. After the class I was beginning to realize just how important those two things were. We went home and started answering all the questions. In the back of my mind I felt it was necessary for us to get this done quickly.

After all the paperwork was completed and while we were waiting for our background checks to clear we worked on our photo collage, birth parent letter, and I started a family website. We had taken some of the adoption classes and were beginning to get over our fears of open adoptions. The fact that we had experience with the three girls and their family through foster care helped us as well. We saw just how much those three sisters wanted to know their family. I must have written our Birth Parent Letter 50 times. I didn’t want to make it too long, or too short, or leave out things that could be important, but in the end I had to trust in the Lord and believe that things would work out in His time. After much stress over the photo collage I had to do the same thing. When I came to the point that I realized we would adopt our children when it was meant to be and not when I wanted it to happen, I was able to relax and really enjoy the adoption process.

All through the summer and into the winter I felt the need to get things prepared to have a child come into our lives. I tried to not think too much about it since we knew the average waiting time to be chosen through LDS Family Services is three years and that we were on the Lord’s time not our time. In November I felt this very urgent need to get things ready. During the summer I had purchased a baby quilt kit and a pattern for a stuffed elephant so I went to the quilting store and purchased fabric to make two stuffed elephants. These stuffed animals would mean a lot in the end with one being given to our future birth mother and the other one for our child. They would be identical. So I went ahead and made these special gifts and put them a nice storage box. I thought to myself that at least I had them ready and wouldn’t have to hurry to get them done later. It was late December and I had been feeling very pressed to get ourselves prepared. A couple days after I finished the gifts we had a message from our caseworker to call her about something.

Wow. What could something mean? It was late Friday night and we would not be able to call our caseworker until the following Monday morning, which I did precisely at 9:00 am. She wasn’t in her office. I had to go to work. I didn’t know what was going on until later that afternoon when my husband called to tell me what the caseworker said. She wasn’t able to give us too much information just that there was a young woman who she wanted to tell us about. This mother was struggling with employment, finding a place to live, and some other things and she was asking for a family to care for her 15 month old child for a short term to see if she could get back on her feet to be able to care for her daughter or if she was going to decide to place her for adoption.

Normally LDS Family Services does not handle foster care but since we were already foster parents and the birth mother was happy with our profile we could discuss it. LDSFS did have to get clearance from church headquarters. She told me the little girl's name and the color of her hair and eyes. It was hard to work the rest of the day and when I arrived home we just could not sit still. Even though the mom wanted to talk about foster care both Bob and I had a feeling that this was it! We would be meeting our future birth mother the very next day!

The meeting was at 10:00 but we arrived at 9:30 so we could speak with our caseworker. The first thing she told us was to not be surprised if the mom did not show up. She told us a little about the mom's situation. She said that if the mom did decide to do foster care she would have a total of four weeks and during that time she had the right to terminate the foster care for any reason. It was 10:30 and the mom had not arrived. It's amazing that we weren't really worried about her not being there yet. She did show up and much to our SURPRISE she brought her little girl too! She carried her in a car seat and the first thing I noticed about the sweet little girl was her huge smile and big brown eyes. She had a little round face with short brown hair. We could tell she was happy. The mom and her boyfriend came in and sat on the couch next to us.

Our caseworker made introductions and she discussed the foster care agreement. She made it very clear to the mom that she did not have to do this and that she had the right to terminate the foster care agreement at any time and take her little girl home. Bob and I sat and listened to everything that was going on and watched the quiet little girl as she sat in her car seat. She had on a yellow sleeper. When the mom said she wanted to do the foster care we were very excited. We asked the mom many questions about her daughter such as what she liked to eat, her daily routine, and favorite toys. The mom told us she did not have a bed for her daughter that she could let us use and she really didn't have any toys. That was totally fine with us. I knew we would just make a trip to the store. After the foster care agreement was signed and everything was discussed the mom and her boyfriend started to leave. I was surprised and asked if we would be picking her up later this week. My mind was racing. We did not have ANYTHING for a baby and we did not know how to take care of a baby or know what to feed them! She told me she was hoping we would take her today. She and her boyfriend left. We now had a little girl to love. After everything was taken care of with our caseworker we picked up our little ray of Sunshine and headed for the store; the only thing that we were given was a bottle, not even one diaper.

We had to buy everything but didn’t know what we needed to buy. We could have guessed what to get a newborn but we had a 15 month old. I found a mom in the store who had 4 kids and she was kind enough to help us chose a car seat; the car seat that our little Sunshine had was too small and too soiled to use. The lady left and we picked out a bunch of clothes, shoes, and dresses. Sadly, we forgot to buy a coat. Then we head to the baby food. For those who have not had kids, looking at all the different stages of baby food, the boxes, and everything else can be very overwhelming. We didn’t even know what a sleeper was. We had no idea what to feed a 15 month old so my husband grabbed a few bottles of baby food, more bottles, and we were on our way.

Luckily one of our neighbors was parked right next to us because as I was in the front seat of the car feeding our little Sunshine my husband had spent the past 45 minutes trying to figure out how to put the car seat in the car. We were still both in shock to have a little one in our lives, were excited to get home and play with our Sunshine that it made it hard to concentrate. My neighbor came out to her car and found us with a baby and wanted to see what was going on. She offered to put the car seat in for us, which only took a few minutes, and then we were on our way home.

We had so much fun with our little Sunshine. For the first week we really worked with teaching her how to walk. We saw her take her first steps and I was so excited. By that Sunday she was walking and her little arms would teeter and totter to help keep her balance. It was so cute. When she would crawl she put her little rear in the air with her legs straight. We called her a spider monkey. We did receive a phone call from her birth mom that week. She just wanted to talk to her and see how things were going. She didn't have a job or a place to live yet. She was staying at her boyfriend's parent's home. Life went on and we enjoyed our little Sunshine and couldn't help falling in love with her from the minute we saw her bright eyes. We knew we may only have her for a short time but we were going to love her even if it were only for just a little while. For that moment she was our little girl.

Her birth mom called again to see how she was doing and invited us over to her brother’s house for dinner. When we arrived we met the entire extended family; aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandmother. We felt a little awkward but only because of the situation; everyone was so nice to us. As we sat on the couch watching their family videos and listening to them talk about their lives I watched everyone and thought there was no way they would allow us to adopt their little girl. We watched the birth mom play with her daughter and could see just how much she loved her. I listened to every word to see if I could get a clue as to what would happen in the next couple weeks when the foster care agreement was over. Something was said that grabbed my attention and made me wonder if we were going to be able to adopt our Sunshine. The birth mom was talking to her mom about the foster care situation and then said, “And then there’s the adoption thing.” I can’t explain how I was feeling when I heard that. I was so nervous, scared, excited, and in disbelief. I didn’t know if it was appropriate for me to ask if she had made a decision or not so I just sat there, waiting for anything more to be said, and nothing was mentioned about it again.

The next day we called our caseworker to see if the birth mom had called her with a decision; she hadn’t received any phone calls. Five LONG days later we found out that the birth mom was going to LDSFS to sign papers to terminate her parental rights. What a day! What great news! We were going to be the parents of our sweet little Sunshine girl. What an amazing feeling to not only be parents to such an amazing little girl but to be chosen as parents for a little girl who has so many people who love her. We felt so blessed and excited but also felt this quiet sadness for our birth mom; it wasn’t such a happy day for her.

We arrived an hour after our birth mother to sign papers for adoption. We brought gifts for her that really could never compare to her gift to us. Our gifts were more to help remind her that she is loved, will be loved, and will always be remembered by us and her daughter. I gave her the stuffed elephant, the one identical to our little Sunshine Girl, Ellary. I gave her a letter that I had put many hours and tears into writing for her. How can you express such love and appreciation for your birth mother in one letter? We gave her a necklace that matches a ring that we are keeping for our daughter when she turns 18 years old. They have our daughter’s and our birth mother’s birthstones on it in the shape of a flower; our birthmother loves nature. We gave her an angel ornament because she is our angel. And most importantly, we gave her a photo album, full of pictures of her little girl.

It was a couple weeks before we heard from our birth mom again. She knew that we were open to an open adoption. That first year we saw her and sometimes with her family or boyfriend, many times that year. We went to the park, to her brother’s house for dinner, and just hung out. Every time we saw her we could see the love she has for her daughter. Our birth mom is very quiet but very sweet. We have to keep the conversation going and are always asking questions about her life. We want to know this information for our daughter.

Our adoption and sealing was in August of 2007. I wish I would have thought to invite our birth mom but it didn’t cross my mind and I had never heard of anyone doing that. I recommend inviting your birth parents if you feel comfortable in doing so.

Almost everyone in our family was able to be there for the adoption and the sealing. It was wonderful, emotional, exciting, spiritual, and overwhelming. Adoption will do that to you; it’s one of the biggest things that will ever happen in your life. You are chosen to adopt a child, a child that is loved so much by their birth parents, and then that child is sealed to you forever. In my opinion, nothing in life can top that.

Our adoption court case was very nice and short. A lot of our family was there. Bob and I, and our little Ellary wore our Sunday best and stood before the judge. The judge made sure that LDSFS did their part to provide services for the birth mom and to locate the birth father. Our lawyer asked us if we realized that adoption was a permanent thing and that we could not walk away from it for any reason. Of course we knew that. He asked if we were able to financially provide for Ellary and how we feel about her. It’s hard to stand up in court and tell the judge just how much you love your child without crying like a baby so be prepared, bring Kleenex and your makeup. I will never forget when the judge made the adoption official. He said it was like Ellary had been born to us. More tears. There wasn’t a dry eye in the building. The judge was so kind; he had everyone stand for pictures which included pictures with him, our attorney, and our caseworker. What a marvelous day. Our little Sunshine girl was officially our little Ellary.

Our sealing was a couple days later. Our families were having fun doing things together and watching our little Ellary get to know her cousins and grandparents she hadn’t seen yet. My sister worked very hard to make a sealing dress for Ella. Bob and I gathered all our things for the sealing and headed to the temple with our daughter. Ella was in a cute pink Sunday dress on the way to the temple. We left her in the play room with some family members and the temple workers when we realized we forgot to bring the adoption decree to the temple. Our home was 30 minutes away and that would make us miss our own sealing! Thank goodness the caseworker at LDSFS was able to fax it to the temple.

We sat in the sealing room with all our family and friends. It was wonderful. My dad was unable to attend our temple marriage but he made it to our sealing with our daughter, I was thrilled. Our dads were the witnesses as we knelt across the altar with our daughter. Ella held onto me tightly and didn’t want to let go. This is again where we heard that it was as if Ellary had been born to us. What joy! Our little Sunshine was ours for all eternity. She looked so pretty in her white dress, the white barrettes that her grandma gave her, her little white shoes and socks that had ruffles. After the sealing we headed to our home for the blessing with just our family. Ella was so excited she did not want to sit still. She knew she was the center of attention and was thoroughly enjoying it. We had a great week and will always remember it.

It’s April of 2010 now. We still have a good relationship with our birth mom. She only lives 12 minutes from our home. An open adoption takes faith from both sides of the adoption. The birth mom has to trust that we will be honest with her, not make promises we won’t keep, and not make her feel uncomfortable. We have to have faith that our birth mom will respect our boundaries, not make promises she can’t keep, and that she will not make us feel uncomfortable. Our birth mom has done that and we hope we are doing that for her. She has our phone numbers, knows our last name, where my husband works, has our email and blog address, and has met a lot of our family. With our next adoption and sealing she has already told us she would like to go. Her birthday is in a couple days and I’m going to drop off another photo album for her. I had it printed in a nice hard cover book. It shows the adoption and sealing of our second child too. Our birth mother is wonderful. She not only cares about our daughter, she cares about our other kids too. We are thankful to her for that and so many other things. We love her. It’s wonderful to hear her tell us that she loves us too.

Recently our birth mom asked if Ella knew who she was. I explained to her that yes, Ella did know that she was her birth mom and that we have talked about it since the first day but she is only 4 years old and still does not understand exactly what a birth mom is. Our birth mom was a little disappointed that Ella didn’t understand it but she knows it will take time. We have a scrapbook that shows Ella in her birth mom’s arms and newborn pictures of Ella with her birth mom. In time she will understand.

Every once in a while we run into the birth aunts and uncles at different stores. It has never been awkward for us simply because they treat us like family but aren’t pushy either. They don’t act like we are off-limits, which would make it very uncomfortable.

There is one thing about adoption that I didn’t know I would feel. I felt as though I owed our birth mother for giving us her daughter. Any time we had a visit with our birth mom I felt guilty for leaving. It took me about 2 ½ years to stop feeling that way. I think it has helped to have our visits, to take pictures of Ella with her birth mom, and to ask as many questions about her as I could. We have a friendship now, not just an adoption connection.

Even though we have a friendship and an open adoption, it’s not as open as you may see with other families. Our birth mom only calls us once or twice a year now to have a visit. She has never been to our home, although I’m sure we’ll invite her one day. And it was only this year that she found out our last name. This year I have also started to send her pictures over the phone and text her cute things that Ella has done. I’m not sure how much our birth mom checks our family blog so I thought it would be nice to do that. Our open adoption has grown to fit both sides. Through it all I know that our birth mom just wants to know that her daughter is ok, that she is loved, and that she is growing up. She does not want to take her back, intrude upon our lives, or make us feel uncomfortable. She loves all of us as much as we love her. Without even realizing it, she has helped us to be more open with open adoption and I’m sure will continue to do so.

I can’t get into much detail but, let me tell you about our son, Aedin.

Aedin came to our family when he was 8 months old through foster care provided by the state. His parents were trying to work through some issues but in the end they relinquished their rights when he was 19 months old. Foster care is totally different from adopting through LDSFS. There is a lot more work, with more classes, but also with more help available to you. Through the year that we had Aedin in foster care we were told by DCFS to not expect to adopt him. If the caseworker is doing their job they will always tell you that because the goal is to reunite families. The parents are offered a lot of services to help them battle and conquer their problems and if they are willing and work hard they can do it. While you have a child in foster care you go to weekly visits with family, may need to take the kids to weekly counseling, have monthly visits with the caseworker, have monthly visits with your Resource Family Consultant, have yearly home inspections, have to take 12 hours of training each year, have to take the kids to all their doctor’s appointments, and anything else that may happen. It can be a lot of meetings sometimes but they are there for a good reason.

With any child that comes into your home you are going to fall in love with them. You are going to want to adopt them. You are going to feel very protective of them. But, you have to realize you have to follow the rules and if it is found to be safe for a child to return home you need to rejoice with that child and then cry after they go home. You will have a broken heart but it will heal, we have had to do it.

In the year that we had Aedin he had to have eye surgery, which was paid by Medicaid. The entire time we had Aedin in our home we thought he was going home. We loved him so much and felt as though he was our little boy but we kept most of his toys packed. We didn’t know until 12 months had passed and the parents had relinquished their rights that we would be able to adopt him. We were so excited! Our little Ella would officially have a brother in just a few weeks!

A couple months before we found out we would be able to adopt Aedin we decided to sign up with LDSFS again. That way, if Aedin went home we would have something else to think about. A couple months before that, we found out that Aedin’s birth mom was pregnant again, with her 8^th child. We had no idea what was going to happen with her and tried to not think about it.

With Aedin we had decided to have the adoption done as soon as we could and then have the sealing later. We adopted him in October, the day before his sister was born. Some of my aunts and uncles and cousins were able to attend. It of course was a wonderful day and I cried when the lawyer asked how I felt about him.

The nice thing with adopting through foster care is all the expenses are paid for by the state and each child adopted through foster care keeps his Medicaid insurance. We had a wonderful attorney who made us feel like family, an even more wonderful caseworker, and the judge was so happy for us. It was the same judge that had dealt with our son’s birth parents all through the foster care experience. This judge gave both our kids teddy bears and had us stand for pictures in the court house. DCFS also has a District Attorney and our son had his Guardian ad Litem, who is his attorney. The whole experience was just as nice as it was when we adopted through LDSFS.

We had the sealing in November when all our family could be there. My sister made Aedin’s sealing outfit and also a doll sized sealing outfit for Aedin’s doll. I had time to make a sealing dress for Ella. We chose to be sealed in a new temple so our family could see it. We invited our family, friends, our caseworker, and our Resource Family Consultant. Ella and Aedin were dressed by temple workers in their beautiful white outfits. All of our family and friends were waiting for us in the sealing room when they brought Bob and me into the sealing room. A little while later they brought in our kids, my daughter and our son. They were going to be siblings for all eternity in just a few short minutes. It took everything I had to not cry. As it was I had cried all through the temple up until we got to the sealing room; my makeup was not going to last much longer. Bob and I knelt at the altar as my daughter came running in with a huge smile and ran to one of her grandmas. The temple worker brought Aedin over to us and he was very curious about what was going on. It will always be the most wonderful thing to hear that your child is sealed to you for time and all eternity, as if they had been born to you. When our little family of four stood in front of the mirrors to see our reflections go on for eternity the first thing Aedin did was put his finger in his nose and he kept it there the entire time; that crazy kid. We celebrated after the sealing and spent time with our family.

I’m sure you are wondering if we have an open adoption with Aedin’s birth parents. The entire time Aedin was in foster care I tried hard to have a friendly relationship with the parents, aunts and uncles, and grandparents. It took a lot of time and patience. They were very suspicion and disgusted with me because I had their little boy. I wrote letters to the birth mom weekly telling her how her son was doing and about all the new things he had been doing. I gave her art projects and more than 300 pictures as well. The mom told me how much she appreciated everything because she had dealt with foster parents before who treated her like she was a leper. When the parents relinquished their rights they asked if we would write yearly letters and send them to DCFS, which we will. We run into their family members at different stores and they have been polite to us. I know things would be different if I had not treated them the way I would have wanted to be treated if I had been in their shoes. They are not bad people; they just have some bad habits. I feel sorry for them. It has been recommended to us that we do not have more of an open adoption than what we are doing now simply to keep our family safe. I do know families who have adopted through foster care who have completely closed adoptions and very open adoptions. It all depends on the circumstances.

We do worry that Aedin will feel left out because we won’t have visits with his birth mother. We are still trying to figure out how we will deal with it. It’s nice that I’m still friends with his caseworker; she’ll be able to help us when we have to cross that bridge. The most important thing we can tell our kids is that their birth families love them dearly but for different reasons they were unable to care for them. I’m grateful that I took pictures of Aedin with his birth family at the weekly visits. I can at least show him that his birth parents did love him.

Do we have any fears about raising a child that we adopted? Not really. I used to worry about other kids at school teasing them for being adopted but if we teach our children that they are loved, and just happen to have been adopted, it shouldn’t bother them. And if it does, we’ll be there to support them. Being adopted doesn’t define who you are, it just shows how you came into your family.

Foster care and adopting through foster care are amazing things. Our family is continuing to grow because of adopting through LDSFS and through foster care. And, right now we have Aedin’s little sister in our home through foster care. We’ll see what happens with her pretty soon.

I’m sorry this is so long but I don’t want to cut out anything more than I already have. I hope you can see how wonderful adoption is, how wonderful open adoptions can be, and how wonderful being foster parents is. Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above. James 1:7

Every child is a gift, no matter how they come into your family.

Birthmother Walk

2010-04-08T20:40:00.001-07:00

Exactly a month from today Provo FSA will be holding our annual Celebrate Adoption Walk at Provo High School. May 8th is Birth Mother's Day and we will be honoring all birth mothers who made the selfless decision to place their children for adoption. Please take a moment to put this event on your calendar. Adoptive couples, birth parents, soon to be adoptive couples, case workers, extended family members basically anyone who supports adoption can come and celebrate with us. We can't wait to see all of you there!

When: May 8th at 10:00am
Where: Provo High School track
1125 N University Ave
Why: To celebrate adoption and all of the birth mothers who have chosen adoption
Bring: Anyone who supports adoption

If you have any questions about this event please e-mail us at provofsa@gmail.com

Case Worker Spotlight

2010-03-29T21:46:00.000-07:00

We thought it would be fun to get to know the case workers who work at the Provo agency. We decided to start with one of our full time case workers Margaret Nell. Hopefully this will help you get to know a little bit about Margaret. Enjoy!

Margaret Nell, LCSW

Margaret began working full time for LDS Family Services in May 2007. She loves to watch miracles in her adoptive couples and birth parent’s lives. “Working for LDS FS has helped me to see the Lord’s hand. I have seen His personal interest in helping His children,” she said. She had the opportunity to work with a couple who waited for a number of years. “I watched them have a baby placed in their arms. It was the baby they had waited for -- it was their baby, not just any child, but theirs. It was a miracle. They don’t take anything for granted. I was blessed to be there.”

Before working for LDS Family Services, Margaret graduated with a degree in history. She worked for a newspaper in Idaho; as a desktop publisher in Salt Lake City; on Capitol Hill in Washington, D.C.; and for a legal public policy organization reaffirming marriage in Washington, D.C. She returned in August 2005 to earn a Master’s in Social Work from BYU. She continues works part time to reaffirm marriage because she believes every child deserves a mother and a father. In her free time, she loves to travel – especially to Europe and the Middle East.

Infertility Conference

2010-03-25T23:00:00.000-07:00

Many of you know that this year's National Infertility Awareness Week is April 24-May 1. This is a week long RESOLVE-sponsored effort to raise awareness about infertility. This email is to let you know about a Utah Infertility Kickoff Event on Saturday, April 24th.

- It is FREE...yes, FREE (we ask that all participants register...beginning April 1st...seating is limited)

- The event features four (4!!!) Board Certified Reproductive Endocrinologists speaking on great topics!

- AMAZING prizes for a giveaway...including FREE New Patient Consultations.

- Variety of wonderful and helpful resources to share.

The day will be a great opportunity to learn, share, and network...all GREAT things to do to raise awareness about infertility.

You can get more information @ www.utahinfertilityawareness.com.

Thanks

Provo FSA Chapter

Television Shows that Support Adoption

2010-03-24T10:44:00.000-07:00

Do you have a little time on your hands and you want to sit back and relax? Does adoption seem to be on your mind all the time and you have more questions about it? Have you heard about any television shows about adoption? If not sit back relax and read about these two great shows that support adoption.

The Locator

This show is on WEtv. Troy Dunn is the Locator on this amazing show. Troy's mother is adopted and he once helped her over 20 years ago to find her birth mother. He has now helped thousands of people find birth parents, children placed for adoption, family members separated etc. Troy and his family live in Flordia and he is a bishop in his local ward. For those of you who were able to make it to the FSA National Adoption Conference last year had the honor of hearing from Troy during the conference as the keynote speaker. He did a fantastic job! Here is some information on Troy Dunn click HERE

This show has me in tears almost everytime I watch it. It's just so sweet to watch people who love and care about a person finally be able to tell them they love them in person. Everyone is almost always grateful to be able to hold them in their arms again after searching for months even years. Sometimes they are just looking for answers to so many questions that start with why? Every story is so unique and everyone's story is so different. I am sure this will be a show you will add to your Tivo season pass.

For more information please visit their website at THE LOCATOR

Adoption Stories

Adoption Stories is on the Discovery Health channel. This show features many types of families who have adopted children in several different ways such as stateside, international, and foster care. Even though the stories aren't always similar to your own children's adoption stories you can't help but cry and remember how it felt when your children were placed in your family and when their adoptions were finalized. I have often wondered about adopting internationally and through foster care and this show has educated me in many aspects of adoption through international and foster care. It is very interesting to see how other people's families have come together through adoption.

If you are interested when Adoption Stories airs and episode discriptions please click HERE

If you know of any other shows that anyone who is interested in adoption would enjoy PLEASE feel free to contact us at provofsa@gmail.com we would love to hear from you. If you have any comments on this post please feel free to contact the Provo FSA chapter at provofsa@gmail.com

Once Upon A Time.... Clayton and Angie's Story

2010-03-14T23:38:00.000-07:00

Clayton and I met when we were 17 years old. We didn’t go to the same high school but we did work together at the same place so we had all the same friends. We started hanging out as a group and within a couple of months he asked me out! We were inseparable from then on and would get flack from our friends about how infatuated we were with each other! We dated for 4 years and were married in June 2000 and were so excited to start our married life together!

Fast forward 5 years…years that had posed many trials and challenges for us as a couple. After several years of battling infertility we were realizing that having a baby might not actually happen for us. Meanwhile in 2003 Clayton was diagnosed with a rare form of soft tissue cancer. We were scared about the unknown but we put all our efforts into focusing on him getting well. I am happy to say that he is cancer free today! Those 5 years were not without lots of happiness and joy though! About 2 ½ years after we were married I was baptized into the LDS church by Clayton and we were sealed for time and all eternity in the Manti temple the following year!

Prayer has played a huge role in our lives and decisions that we have made in our marriage. When the realization that we weren’t able to conceive finally hit us, we put our trust in Heavenly Father that he would answer our prayers and help us know what we should do next. Our answer to adopt was very clear, it also brought us so much peace to know that we were doing what Heavenly Father wanted us to do. We recognized that he has a plan for our family and that plan was adoption.

We signed up with LDS family services and about a year of waiting later we decided to sign up with a private agency (Heart to Heart Adoptions) as well. In the almost 2 years total time that we waited we did have 2 “failed” placements and had learned a lot about the adoption process along the way. We also learned even more to trust in Heavenly Father and have faith to continue on. One morning in June of 2007, about a week after our 7th wedding anniversary, I received a call from Heart to Heart telling me that we had been chosen by a wonderful birth mother named Diane to adopt her baby boy!! We were ecstatic!! There are no words to describe getting that call! Our baby was due in 5 weeks so we had NO time to spare!

Driving to the restaurant to meet Diane for the first time, we were both nervous wrecks. What if we said the wrong thing? What if she saw us and changed her mind? There were so many scenarios playing thru our minds but more than anything we wanted to meet her, hug her, give her support and let her know how much we already loved her. When we finally met her we were relieved to see that she was nervous too! She was sweet, kind and funny and helped to put us at ease. We were excited to begin this new relationship with her that we knew we would cherish for the rest of our lives.

We did have some family and friends that had some apprehensions about placement. After having gone through a couple of failed placements I think they were just concerned for us and didn’t want us to be crushed if this placement didn’t happen. I can say with absolute certainty that we knew without a doubt that this little boy was to be our son. The very first thing we did after receiving the call that we had been chosen, was to begin to pray for confirmation that this was Heavenly Father’s will for our family. Our prayers were again answered with feelings of peace and comfort that he was the little boy that had been intended for our family all along.

A couple of days before Diane’s due date, I received a call from our caseworker early one morning saying that Diane had gone into labor and was already at the hospital. They had tried to call me several times but I was in the shower and didn’t hear the phone! I frantically called Clayton at work to tell him the news! I didn’t even finished getting ready, instead I jumped in the car with wet hair and sped to Claytons work to pick him up so we could get to the hospital in time!! When we got to the hospital our main concern was Diane and how she was feeling. Neither of us had ever experienced being there for someone to give birth before so we didn’t really know what to expect. We gained SO MUCH respect for Diane that day just watching her go through labor. When Adam was born we were privileged enough to be in the room to see his birth, I even cut the umbilical cord!

We never had any fears about placement. Our fears and concerns were only directed at Diane and her well being. I was especially concerned that I would never be able to express to her just exactly what she means to me. There is a special and unique kind of love that an adoptive mother has for her child’s birthmother. It’s so deep and full of respect and awe. I know that the decision that Diane made for her baby was a gift for him to have a better life. I hope and pray that in return her own life has been blessed through her brave choice.

Our caseworker had explained the relinquishment process to us and told us that we would be taken to a separate room while Diane signed and then when she was done they would bring the paperwork to us to sign. Afterwards we would go into her room, exchange gifts and say our goodbyes (She lived in another State and would be returning home). One of our gifts to her was a beautiful diamond necklace with Adam’s birthstone in the middle so that she could always have a little piece of him to carry close to her heart. I had also made her a special scrapbook and had a photo album for her with some pictures of Adam in it. When the time came to leave her room so she could sign, I was actually holding Adam. I remember very clearly when the caseworker came in and told us it was time to go. I got up and carried Adam over to Diane to place him in her arms. She had quietly started crying and shook her head at me indicating that she didn’t want to hold him but wanted to me to take him instead. I had not expected this to happen and my heart ached for her. I barely made it out into the hall before I broke down sobbing. There is so much joy and so much sorrow all at once. Nothing could have prepared us for this part of the process. About 20 minutes later our caseworker came in with the paperwork for us to sign. Meanwhile she told us that Diane had decided that it was too hard for her to see us so we weren’t going to be allowed to give her our gifts in person or hug her goodbye. I couldn’t hold back the tears at the point. I wanted to tell Diane in person how much I loved her, I wanted to tell her that Adam would be ok and that we would do our best to raise him in a righteous and loving home. We had to respect her decision though and hoped that she was ok. I remember asking over and over for them to make sure that she was alright. They assured us that they would help her get through it and that she was confident with her decision to place him with us but she had to deal with her grief in her own way. About an hour later we were walking out of the hospital with our beautiful son sleeping in his car seat!!! I’m not gonna lie….it was an AMAZING feeling!! We drove home in complete awe of our experiences and couldn’t wait to introduce Adam to our families!!

When Adam was 6 months old preparations were underway to finalize the adoption. We had a court date set on a Friday, our temple sealing scheduled for the next day, and his baby blessing was to be the day after that! It was a busy and wonderful weekend!! We were excited to go to court and express our love for our little boy. Our judge was so sweet and friendly and I remember her specifically saying she could “see and feel our love for our son”. The following day we were sealed together in the temple. We were overjoyed to have him in the temple with us and know that our family was eternal! Our family and friends came to share in our happiness and made the day even more special. Adam was blessed the next day by Clayton. I’m so grateful to have a loving and obedient husband who is worthy to hold the priesthood. We felt the spirit strongly that day and most especially felt Heavenly Father’s love for us.

Adam is African American and he is the most beautiful little boy we have ever laid eyes on! Our biggest fear with adopting a child from a race other than our own, was geographical. We live in a predominantly Caucasian community and wondered if our son would be singled out or feel like he didn’t fit in. From the beginning we were determined to not make race an issue. He’s black and we’re white… it is what it is. He is our son and we are his proud parents! If tomorrow morning we all woke up and I was green with yellow polka dots I can guarantee you my family would love me just the same! HA! But in all seriousness we do have Adam’s well being in mind. Adam is in a Tran racial playgroup that gets together weekly. We will always celebrate his heritage and encourage him to do the same. We have an open adoption which we feel is SO important to his development. He has a right and a privilege to know where he comes from, who he looks like and why he is so very special!

Our family and friends adore Adam, he’s quite the celebrity in our neck of the woods! We haven’t observed any issues relating to him being African American. If anything he has been a tool in educating those around us that we all have our differences but we are all Heavenly Father’s children just the same. We have had a few negative experiences with strangers though that still completely amaze me. I remember clearly the time I was grocery shopping at Walmart and a woman said to me “White people should not be allowed to adopt black babies”. I wish I can say that I handled that situation well. What I should have said is “Love knows no color and has no boundaries” Instead I yelled and ranted like any over protective mother would do. Then there was the time that I took Adam in to see the doctor because he had a cold. We had never seen this particular doctor before but he was the only one available. When he saw Adam he proceeded to tell me his opinions of black people, his experiences with them and so on..and none of it was positive. Oh how I wish I would have had the courage to ask him to stop and then turn around and walk out of the room! Unfortunately prejudice and racism still exist and their all around us. One of my jobs as a mother is to provide my son (and my future children) with the tools to help them navigate through life so that they can make a difference and change stereotypes. I want them to know that they can “Turn to Christ with faith and patience and receive the strength to face adversity.” (2010 ensign)

We continue to have an open adoption with Adam’s birthmother and that will continue the rest of our lives. We are so grateful for her and her decision to place him with us. We have a strong testimony of the gospel and Heavenly Father’s plan for each of us. We know that without the trials of infertility we would not have been lead on the path of adoption and for that reason we consider infertility one of our biggest blessings. We are so grateful for the power of prayer, it gives us the opportunity to draw closer to Heavenly Father and increases our faith. We are so blessed and privileged to be Adam’s parents and to be a forever family!

In September of 2009, our adoption paperwork was approved with LDS family services and we are eagerly awaiting the day when we will be chosen to adopt another precious child. We just know that Adam will be an incredibly loving and sweet older brother! We look forward to this new journey with much faith, prayer and hope in our hearts! Claytonandangie.blogspot.com

Once Upon A Time....Matt and LeMira's story

2010-03-07T11:24:00.000-08:00

How did you and your spouse meet?

In January 2000, Matt moved into LeMira's housing complex and BYU single's ward. The first week or so back from semester break, the ward activities committee hosted a dance. It was at that dance that LeMira got a first glance at Matt, and she was hooked! He didn't even notice her then, but she knew she was gonna like that guy; and she was even more excited because he was going to be in her Family Home Evening (FHE) group.

During those Monday activities, we got to know each other really well -- so well that our "brothers and sisters" in our FHE group thought that our flirting was fighting. When we were told to "be nice" to each other, we turned to each other and just laughed. We knew we were just having fun. LeMira began conveniently studying in the same building where Matt worked.

Then, we began meeting each other for lunch, at first it happened randomly, and we began looking for each other and coordinating times. During those lunch sessions is when we really got to know each other. By the end of the semester, our best-friendship had turned into dating. By June we were engaged. On August 15, 2000, we were sealed in the St. George Utah Temple for time and for all eternity.

What brought you to the decision to adopt?

Like many others, adoption wasn't something at first that we thought we'd consider. In January 2004, we had our first baby boy born at 25 weeks and 5 days. The next 5 1/2 months of him living in the hospital and wondering day to day if he were going to live was an emotional roller coaster that we hoped we'd never have to ride again. Jackson came home in July 2004 and is now a thriving six year old.

In 2005, LeMira got pregnant with our second child and all seemed to be going well. At 22 weeks and 5 days, however, she gave birth to our little angel, Clarissa. Because both deliveries were done via emergency C-Section, LeMira's doctor told her that if she got pregnant again, she and the baby would probably die. He told her that she should not get pregnant again because her body would not be able to handle it. As you can imagine, our world was turned upside down, or so we thought at first.

After a year of grieving, thinking, the Spirit nudging, and many prayers, we received our answer that we were to adopt. We went to the temple one day in October 2006 praying to know if adoption was the right answer, and when we left, we knew it was. It's been almost 3 1/2 years since we began our adoption journey, and we still know we're supposed to be here.

What thoughts, fears, and emotions did you have before you started the adoption process?

We had many reservations, questions and emotions. How could we even begin to save money to afford adoption? Could we love a baby that "wasn't ours"? How would our families react? After many years, would a birth parent come and demand the baby back? How soon would we get a baby? We had anxiety over how long it might take and how long we'd have to wait. We didn't want to wait more than a year, but it's now been three. We had a lot of misconceptions in the beginning. Most were answered at the workshops.

How did you tell your family and friends about your choice to adopt? What were their reactions?

When we decided to tell our families, we began by calling our parents and just telling them. Of course they had many questions, and we didn't have many answers at first. It's been a journey for all of us. Our families have been completely supportive. They really just want us to be happy, and they are all more than excited to welcome a new member in our families. After we made our decision in the fall of 2006, LeMira's family had just started a new Christmas tradition. Instead of exchanging gifts, they'd decided to all anonymously donate money to a family in need each season. Each year a different sibling and his/her family would find a family in need that we could help. To our surprise and deepest gratitude, that first year LeMira's family picked us. They had secretly collected the money a month early and at our Thanksgiving dinner presented a check for 2/3 of the amount we'd need for the adoption. Matt's grandparents and a few friends have also contributed a significant amount. Within 2 months of our decision to adopt, we had collected almost all of the money we needed for adoption. We felt very strongly that the Lord answered our prayers through the generous, unexpected contributions. We feel like we can't back out now.

If you have experienced infertility what are your feelings on this?

LeMira: To many other couples, we may not qualify as "infertile" because LeMira has gotten pregnant several times. However, we still had to grieve over the loss of not being able to have any more children. (LeMira speaking here) I felt confused about my role as a woman, wife, and mother. I spent a lot of time on my knees praying to find peace, comfort, and direction. For a while, I kept thinking that I should go back to work as a teacher. Honestly, I thought that my womanhood had been stripped from me.

Matt: While the stigma of infertility doesn't apply, the end result is the same. For me, it was easier to accept because it seemed very matter-of-fact, and there was nothing I could do to fix it. It was harder to watch LeMira's reaction because it was very personal to her.

If your child is of age how did you tell them about your decision to adopt? Have you talked to them about adoption? What were their reactions?

Jackson is now six years old, and we've tried to explain adoption to him, but I'm not sure that he really understands. He knows that we are praying for a baby, and he prays for a baby with us. He's excited to be a big brother, and he sometimes talks about it. We are very open about where he came from and where our next baby will come from, and I don't think it really phases him that much. Part of it is his personality, I think.

What concerns, feelings do you have in regards to adopting a child compared to having a biological child? What concerns do you have after you have adopted and that child feeling loved, accepted, your biological child’s reactions etc.

I think our biggest concerns have to do with health problems that might run in the family line that we don't know about. However, we've dealt with many health issues with our son that no one in the family has dealt with, so we think we're prepared to take on that challenge. We don't have any worries about falling in love with an adopted child. When we brought Jackson home after his 5 1/2 month stay in the hospital, we had to adjust to feeling like he was completely ours. For so long, he belonged to the hospital/medical world it seemed. We know this baby will be loved and accepted by us and our family as they have been waiting right along with us.

Our biggest worries revolve around Jackson's reaction to the baby. However, we also don't think these feelings are strange or unique to adoption. We'd worry about how Jackson's life would change even if the baby were going to be biological. We are actually excited for Jackson to learn how to share time and affection with a sibling. We do worry a little that he might feel a little left out with an open adoption because he's so used to getting all of the attention, and it might be hard on him for his sibling to receive extra attention from a birth parent. However, we believe with being open and close as a family that he can understand and accept it as long as we continue to give him the attention he needs.

How was it meeting your caseworker? Were you nervous, excited, anxious, scared, etc?

We were very nervous in meeting our caseworker because we thought that we had to try so hard to make a good impression. We were excited as well because it meant that we were actually going through with the adoption. We wondered if she was going to tell us that we weren't good candidates or that something was wrong. However, when we met our first caseworker (we're now on our 4th caseworker in 3 years), she made us feel comfortable as she was genuine in her efforts to get to know us.

Tell us about your approval process, the paperwork, letters, collages, etc. What were your feelings etc.

We went to the first orientation meeting that we could, and then paid our money up front. The paperwork was really overwhelming at first because it was all new. In the end, we took our time getting it all done; and we finished all of the paperwork and were approved for adoption in May 2007. Again, we were worried about putting something "wrong" down. If anything, though, through the whole process we've learned that we aren't doing anything "wrong" by being ourselves. By far, the hardest part of the paperwork was writing the birth parent letter. We've written several different ones in the last couple of years as we've grown and changed. Some days it's still hard to know what a birth parent really thinks when he/she reads our letter or looks at our pictures for the first time.

What have you done to help find your child and their birth parents?

We feel like just about the only thing we haven't done is pay for a subscription to put our profile up on Parent Profiles. We have made pass along cards and passed them out to all of our family and friends; we have a Facebook group; we've created an adoption blog; we have a "button" for our adoption blog that you can find on many of our friends' and families' blogs; we've sent out a letter specifically concerning our adoption with pass along cards; we've sent out many emails; and we attend the temple once a month and pray for our birth mother to find us and for us to be prepared for when it's our time to adopt. We're just not sure if we can find a way to pay for the monthly subscription to the Parent Profiles website. Perhaps that will be our next leap of faith.

During the waiting/finding process what feelings, emotions, and experiences have you had?

Excitement, anticipation, frustration, worry, despair, anxiety, numbness, reassurance. Yes, all of those emotions, and they cycle through over and over again. We've never had expectant parents contact us directly, but we have had several different experiences when our information has been passed along, and we prayed for a specific person/situation. With each friend/family member who says, "I know someone who is pregnant/looking for an adoptive couple," our heart skips a beat. We get excited, and we begin praying fervently. We worry when we don't hear news, and then we despair when we find out that they're not interested in us or they've chosen to keep the baby. Then, we're numb again for a while and take a step back and recover from the emotions. We get frustrated when we see nothing happening. It's just so hard. Some things that have helped before were to get busy. Actually, that always helps. LeMira has made a couple of quilts and a scrapbook for the birth mother. We've created a blog and adoption cards. All of these things help us pass the time. It also helps us to feel like we're doing all we can. After a while of nothing, nothing, nothing, we get a call or a note from someone who says, "We're thinking of you and sharing your news with others." Then, we feel reassurance that we're where we are supposed to be, even if it means we're still just sitting in the "waiting pool."

Have you talked to other couples/families who have adopted about their experiences? Read any material on adoption?

We have a couple of friends who have adopted and who are trying to adopt. The best thing we have done is to have a friend who is experiencing the ups and downs of adoption. It's a great comfort to know that you don't have to explain your feelings to someone because they know.

Have you attended any of the adoption workshops? Was it helpful?

Basically, we have attended the required workshops, but that was 3 years ago. However, those workshops made all of the difference in some of our decisions. The workshop that changed us the most was the Birth Parent Panel. It was there, while listening to birth mothers share their personal experiences, that we opened our hearts and welcomed an open adoption. We were able to see just how much healing and joy could come from an open adoption. The workshops were also a good teaching tool that debunked our misconceptions.

Please share anything that else you think would be helpful to other couples in your situation.

You're going to want to ask, "Why is it taking so long? What is wrong with us that nobody is choosing us?" In fact, it's so easy to get down on yourselves because you feel like your are doing something wrong or that you're not good enough to adopt because a birth parent hasn't taken home your profile. We feel that way all of the time. Time and time again, however, we feel the spirit whisper to us, "Not yet; be patient." We've also learned to ask our caseworker very candid questions and ask that she be very honest and up front with us. It's hard to hear that no one is interested in you, but it's also very helpful to reevaluate your efforts and your collage and your letter. Are you being honest and open with your letter? Probably. You are a wonderful couple trying to adopt, and so are all of the other couples. It's not a competition; it's a waiting game. Instead of asking the Lord "When is it going to happen?" we've had to learn to ask, "Help us to be prepared for when it happens and help us to know what we can do more to help it happen." It's never easy, and we're hoping that from the acute bitterness (the waiting, the roller coaster of emotions) will come exquisite sweetness and joy when our time comes to adopt.

Matt & LeMira's adoption blog mattandlemiraareadopting.blogspot.com

If you have any comments or questions in regards to this post or FSA please feel free to e-mail us at provofsa@blogspot.com

Supporting the American Fork Skate Night

2010-02-28T15:09:00.000-08:00

Some of the families from the Provo Chapter went and supported the American Fork chapter at their skate night. We had SO MUCH FUN!! It was the first time several of our children had gone roller skating. American Fork had a great turn out and many of us were able to meet new families from the American Fork Chapter. It was a fun night and we were all grateful that we had the opportunity to meet other families who have adopted or are trying to adopt. It's a wonderful reminder that we are all in this TOGETHER so let's all support one another and the cause of adoption. WE LOVE ADOPTION!!! Thank you to the American Fork Chapter for letting us come to your great activity. Thank you for a fun night. We hope to see all of you very soon at one of our next activities.

If you have any comments or questions in regards to this post or FSA please feel free to e-mail us at provofsa@blogspot.com

American Fork Chapter Skate and Celebrate

2010-02-17T22:47:00.000-08:00

American Fork is having a skate night and we would like to invite anyone from the Provo Chapter to go and join the skate night. We are all in this together and are here to support each other in this adoption process. We hope you can come and have a fun night with many other amazing couples! We look forward to seeing you there.
Skate and Celebrate!!

Tuesday, February 23, 2010
7:00 - 9:00 pm
Classic Skating, 250 S State Street, Orem
Everyone invited!
Birth mothers invited!

Admission & Skate Rental are FREE
Bring a finger food to share. The concession stand will be open.
You don't skate...there will be plenty of fun to have so come and enjoy mingling with FSA members and the LDS FS staff.
We look forward to seeing you there.

The following companies will be there to show their support for adoption and to display their products and services:

Birthmother Baskets-a non-profit company that receive donations and use those donations to create and deliver baskets of goodies to birth mothers.
Spaces for Faces- create pass along cards.
Tiny Touches- do hand and foot impressions.
A display table of children's adoption books for your reference.
A display table of birth mother gift ideas.
FSA store- purchase adoption shirts, car decals and more.

American Fork is having a Skate night and we thought we would like to let couples in the Provo Chapter know they are more than invited to go and join their activities. We hope you can come and have a fun night with many other amazing couples!

Once Upon A Time....Sean and Jenn's story

2010-02-09T15:09:00.001-08:00

Sean and I met in our hometown in So. California at a church activity after Sean had returned from his mission. We quickly discovered that we had a lot in common and that we had found the person we wanted to spend forever with. We dated for 3 years and were sealed in the San Diego Temple.

Immediately after getting married, we moved to Utah where Sean had already begun school at BYU. After a few years of getting our lives started, receiving degrees, graduate school, buying a home and working in stable jobs, we knew that the time was right for us to start our family. It’s seems that easy, right? After several doctors visits, appointments with specialists, and many physically and emotionally painful tests, we were told that we would not be able to conceive a child. We were devastated. It was difficult for me to grasp the idea that I would not be able to fill a role in my life that I had dreamed of since I was a little girl. We immediately turned to our Heavenly Father for His guidance and he quickly answered our prayers. We knew that our children would come to our family through the miracle of adoption. It was then that our dream of conceiving and carrying a child changed and we began to fully understand that our real dream was to be parents, not necessarily to carry a child.

It was humbling to feel our Heavenly Father’s love and to recognize that he cared enough for us to guide us in our desire to have a family. But despite that, we still had many fears as we started the adoption process. It was terrifying to go into something like this with no experience…we didn’t really know anyone who was adopted, or who had adopted. Our biggest fear was openness. We had no idea what that meant and all that we read on the internet or heard was how wonderful it was and we kind of felt bad for being so apprehensive about it. Our families were all new to adoption and felt a little apprehensive as well. We also worried about bonding and how that would be affected by openness. We were terrified that we would never be able to feel like the child we adopted was “ours” if we always had the presence of birth parents in our lives.

Despite the fact that we had these fears, we were excited to complete our paperwork and get everything started. We strongly knew that this was the direction our Heavenly Father was sending us in. We were approved in October 2006 and as instructed by our caseworker, we began our own finding efforts. We created our web page on itsaboutlove.org, sent out letters and pass along cards and told everyone we knew that we were hoping to adopt. This was a really hard part of the adoption process for us. Not the finding efforts, but in waiting to hear something back from our efforts. It was a hard concept to swallow that the child who was supposed to come to our family would arrive when it was time. We wanted that time to be NOW! (p.s. Now that we’ve adopted, we KNOW that this is true. The right child will come to your family when the time is right). This was also a very spiritual time for our family. We grew closer to our Heavenly Father in our pleadings for a family and he softened our hearts and prepared us for our soon to be growing family.

In March 2007, we received an e-mail (our first and only contact from a birth parent up to this point) from an amazing young woman (through itsaboutlove.org) who was due in June and wondered "if we were interested in her and her baby." We cried and laughed and screamed and unsuccessfully tried to not get too excited. Quickly, we e-mailed her back and told her that we were interested, answered her questions and asked her a ton of questions back. From the little that we had learned about her in her first e-mail, we already loved her and admired her for her consideration of adoption.

We e-mailed back and forth everyday for a few weeks and even scheduled a time in the next week to meet her and her family. A few days before meeting her, she asked us to call her later on in the evening. When we called her we chatted for a few minutes and it was obvious that we were all nervous. She didn’t really say anything and we finally asked her what she wanted us to call for. That’s when she said, "I wanted to ask you if you would be the parents of my baby." We immediately cried, laughed and screamed and told her that of course we would!!

A few days later we were given the opportunity to meet her and her family at a face-to-face. We connected immediately and the spirit whispered to each of us that what was happening was right and gave us a feeling of peace and calmness.

After that visit, we spent a lot more time getting to know each other. We went to dinner with her and her family several times, went baby clothes shopping, met her grandparents, introduced her to some of our family, e-mailed almost everyday and talked on the phone. It was a great way to prepare us for an open relationship after placement and it calmed many of the fears that we had going into the adoption process. Our love for this birth mom was growing everyday.

Late one night in June, we received a call from our birth mom’s family telling us she was just admitted into the hospital and that C was on his way. We sat by our phone waiting to hear everything that was happening and they were so nice to call us and update us several times. We didn't sleep at all that night and counted the hours until we could get up and go to the hospital to see C and his birth mom.

When we arrived at the hospital, our birth mom’s father and brother met us outside and told us how beautiful C was and that they were so excited for us to meet him. With flowers in hand, we walked inside the hospital room where they had him in his bed for us to see as soon as we walked in. It took our breath away as we felt the immense reality of everything that was happening. We were so humbled by C's birth mom's decision to place him for adoption. Even at just 16, she was so mature and had such an understanding of her love for her child and what she wanted for him. Our love for C was instant. All of our fears about bonding instantly disappeared and we realized that we were excited about keeping an open relationship with this amazing young woman.

C stayed in the hospital with his birth mom for 5 days until we met again on Saturday for placement. It was such an emotional time and although we trusted C's birth mom's decision to place, we knew that she had the right to change her mind. We met our caseworker at the hospital where he had us sign lots of paperwork, and then we just waited in the waiting room. It was a very intense time. We sat in the waiting room fighting back tears (mostly unsuccessfully) while we chatted with our caseworker trying to pass what seemed like hours for her caseworker to come and tell us that it was time for the actual placement. When they did, there was an overwhelming sense of relief and at the same time some trepidation for placement. We knew that it would be an emotional experience, but other than that, we didn’t know what to expect.

When we walked into the meeting room where everyone was, there was an overwhelming spirit of peace and comfort. The room was packed full of family members who love C and wanted him to have both a mother and a father and opportunities that they felt C’s birth mother could not offer him at that point in her life. We exchanged gifts took lots of pictures, and at the end C’s birth mom placed him in his car seat to leave. (This was her idea, but we probably wouldn’t do it that way again).

We have shared an open adoption with C's birth family, although it has not always been easy. One thing that we learned quickly after bringing C home was that it was important to communicate with the birth family and to be honest when we were not comfortable with something. Our rule has always been that we will never promise something that we don’t plan to carry through with and although we were doing that, they were hoping to have more openness than planned. After working everything out, our relationship has been great!

Our other fear about bonding with C because of an open relationship with the birth family was just that-only a fear. Our love for him is immense and words cannot describe how much we love him. He truly is the child who was supposed to be a part of our family and we can’t imagine our lives without him. We have never doubted that we are his parents and have been from the moment we met him. The sealing power of the Temple is real and eternal and has strengthened that bond in our family for eternity.

The miracle of adoption has been one of the most amazing blessings in our lives and we are grateful to a loving Heavenly Father who has guided our way to our eternal family.

If you have any comments or questions in regards to this post or FSA please feel free to e-mail us at provofsa@blogspot.com

New to our blog

2010-02-08T15:42:00.000-08:00

We are starting a new series on the blog called Once Upon A Time.......

We are so excited to be able to share adoption stories from ALL over the adoption triad. We will be featuring adoptive families who have adopted an infant, through foster care, trans racial, out of state, through other agencies and more! We will also have some birth mothers share their very personal story about choosing adoption for their child, choosing a family, placement and share some of their insight.

Our hopes for these new postings is to help others to relate and learn from each other. One of the blessings that we have received serving on the FSA board was meeting so many incredible people who went through similar situations with infertility, open adoptions, legal adoption issues etc. We were able to learn from each other and support each other. It helped us cope with our infertility, as well as support us when different trials came up with adoption.

Please read these people's heart felt stories and experiences with adoption. We would love to hear from you! Please e-mail any comments or thoughts to provofsa@gmail.com We look forward to hearing from you. Enjoy these incredible stories.

Year End Review

2010-01-26T23:12:00.000-08:00

Below are some posts showing just some of the things that our FSA chapter was involved in last year. We are looking forward to another AMAZING year! We are excited to meet new people and have you join such a wonderful cause. We are so grateful to everyone for all of their help making this past year a success.

We have some fun things coming up on the blog so please check back often. If you have any questions or would like to be involved with FSA please feel free to contact us provofsa@gmail.com

We look forward to seeing all of you at this years upcoming events!

UVU FSA Booth

2010-01-26T23:05:00.001-08:00

We had the opportunity to go to a free adoption conference that was held at UVU. We had a great time talking to many people about FSA and what we are about. We were able to talk about what is going on in the world of adoption. We met several people who were interested in getting involved with FSA. We had the booth there all day and we feel like it was a big sucess. Thanks to everyone who volunteered to come and help out at the booth.

BYU Homecoming Parade

2010-01-26T22:38:00.000-08:00

Every year we look forward to the BYU Homecoming Parade. It is so much fun to hear people yell from the crowd, "I'm adopted", "One of my family members is adopted!" The kids love all of the attention and waving to everyone. Anyone who is supportive of adoption and would like to be in the parade and see how much fun it is please come out for the Homecoming Parade! It is always the morning of the BYU football homecoming parade.

National FSA Conference

2010-01-26T22:18:00.000-08:00

Every year this conference gets better and better. This conference is a MUST if you are considering adoption, new to adoption, or have adopted. This two day conference is chuck full of very useful and great information. This year the keynote speaker was the host Troy Dunn from the show "The Locator". He did an incredible job touching about everyone who is a part of the adoption triad. There were several panels, classes given by experts in the field, and adoptive couples who have been there. This year they had several classes for expectant parents, birth parents and their families. It was a huge hit! This conference is one you don't ever want to miss. It is scheduled for July 30 and 31st 2010. Now you don't have a excuse to miss this years conference.

24th of July Spanish Fork Parade

2010-01-26T22:02:00.000-08:00

We are lucky enough to be in one of Utah's BIGGEST parades. We love going out and spreading the good word of adoption to the community. The kids love waving from the float and throwing candy. Adoptive couples who are anywhere in the adoption process just starting, waiting or have already adopted enjoyed meeting other couples and learning more about adoption. This is such a fun event and we hope that ANYONE and EVERYONE families, friends adoptive couples, caseworkers, thinking about adopting ANYONE would come out and help us spread the good word of adoption. Put it in your calendar right now July 24th Spanish Fork Parade! See you there!

Celebrate Adoption Walk on Birth Mother's Day

2010-01-26T21:27:00.000-08:00

We had our 2nd annual Celebrate Adoption Walk this year. Every year it gets bigger and we had a great time seeing everyone come out from all over the state of Utah. We were all able to come out and support adoption and promote adoption to the community through the newspaper and the news. We also choose to have our walk on Birth Mother's Day since if it wasn't for the choice of these selfless woman we wouldn't have adoption be a part of our lives. We are so grateful to everyone who came out to this event. We can't wait for next year and we hope to see even more people out to this awesome event this coming May. Put it in your planner it's the Saturday before Mother's Day at the Provo High School track. See you then!

Adoption Tax Credit

2010-01-11T20:45:00.000-08:00

As you might have heard, the Provo Families Supporting Adoption chapter is actively working to petition the Utah State Legislature to enact a tax credit for adoption expenses. Please join us in helping support this petition by visiting http://www.adoptiontaxlaw.org/

On the site you can view the petition, the proposed bill, press releases and other information related to this effort. You can show your support of this petition by completing the form and also by writing to your legislator. If you are not sure how to write your Legislator, the "Write your Legislators" link on the website will walk you through the process.

Your support will go a long way in helping to make sure this bill becomes law.

Adoption Walk

2009-11-05T14:35:00.000-08:00

Please join us this Saturday for the annual Liberty Park Adoption Walk in Salt Lake City!

Registration is 9:30 a.m. and the walk is 10:00a.m. - 12:00 p.m. in Liberty Park on the north east corner. Wear Orange.This is such a wonderful event where you can meet so many amazing
couples who are in different stages of the adoption process.

FSA Fall Events

2009-10-06T22:02:00.000-07:00

BYU Homecoming Parade - October 24th

Come ride on our FSA Float. Meet at the Marriott Center Parking Lot at 9:00 a.m. This is such a fun activity and a great way to promote adoption in our community. Bring an FSA shirt or we'll have some for sale.

UVU Adoption Symposium - November 2nd

Join others associated with adoption for classes and information on all aspects of adoption. This will be held at the Utah Valley University Campus. More information to come!

Salt Lake Adoption Awareness Walk - Nov. 7th

More information to come

Boondocks Family Fun Day - November 7th

Come enjoy a fun FREE day at Boondocks. Sponsored by the UAC - Utah Adoption Council. Also more info to come

Spanish Fork Parade - come and support

2009-07-21T14:56:00.000-07:00

Come and join us as we promote adoption by riding on our float in the Spanish Fork Parade on July 24th. Please arrive around 8:00 a.m. This is a huge parade and lots of fun.

Below are the directions of where to meet :

Take I-15 to Spanish Fork Main Street, head south to 300 South (Canyon Road) and turn left (east). Follow to 1150 East and turn left (northeast). Follow to 108 South and turn left (west). Turn left (south) into Church parking lot at about 970 East.

Flyer for National Conference

2009-06-22T19:27:00.000-07:00

Mark your calendars!

2009-06-14T21:16:00.000-07:00

National FSA Conference

July 31st - August 1st, 2009

For registration information visit this link

http://familiessupportingadoption.blogspot.com/

Horsing Around

2009-06-06T22:46:00.001-07:00

JUNE 8^th – 6:00-8:00pm (Hosted by American Fork Chapter)

Come spend your Family Night with us at Thanksgiving Point. The theme for the night is Horsing Around - Horses play, and so do you. Ride down to the farm for a night of horse trivia and horse crafts. While you are here don’t forget to take a ride on the ponies or take a wagon ride around the farm. Giddy up! We’ll have an area for FSA families to mingle and have some treats. (There is no special price for us this year. L)

Birthmothers Day, Celebrate Adoption Walk

2009-04-20T21:55:00.000-07:00

Please come and join us for our 2nd annual Celebrate Adoption Walk. It will be held on May 9th which is Birthmothers day. This is a wonderful opportunity to celebrate adoption and to honor birthmothers. We will be walking the track, playing games, having some breakfast, and having a great time. The walk will be held on the Provo high school track, the address is 1125 N. University Ave. Provo, UT. The track is behind the school heading west.

2009-04-02T13:32:00.000-07:00

Provo FSA would like to congratulate Danielle Kennington (pictured right) as Young Mother of the Year, awarded by American Mothers Inc. Danielle resides in Provo and currently has one adopted daughter and is approved and hoping for another child.

On March 4th Danielle spent the day at the capitol meeting the Governor, the Senate, and House of Representatives. Danielle used this opportunity to promote adoption. She said, "Representative Clark read my biography where I had written about how we adopted a child and are hoping to adopt another child. I feel like I am representing women who are mothers through adoption."

At the meeting the senate spoke of mothers saying, "Whereas the presentation and strengthening of family values is of great importance to many Utahns who share the ideals of American Mothers, Inc., Utah Association. The Legislature of this state of Utah recognizes the efforts of American Mothers, Inc., Utah Association to strengthen the moral and spiritual foundations of the family and the home. Be it further known that the Legislature expresses its appreciation for the tireless devotion and hard work demonstrated by all Utah mothers in the care and nurturing of their families".

Again as an FSA we congratulate Danielle for her efforts to strengthen mothers and promote adoption!

FSA National Conference, Don't Miss It

2009-04-01T20:43:00.000-07:00

July 31st - August 1st: National FSA Conference in Layton, Utah at the Davis Conference Center. See the National FSA Website for details. This is a wonderful conference with great classes and loads of information. It is also a great place to network and meet others associated with adoption.

Great Articles on Adoption This Month

2009-02-17T21:36:00.001-08:00

Here are some links to some great adoption articles that were in the February issues of the Ensign and the Friend magazines. ENJOY!

Ensign Article - Click Here

Friend Article - Click Here

February Workshop - Chat Room

2009-01-06T20:52:00.000-08:00

February's required adoptive applicant workshop will be an informal chat room session headed by FSA. Though it is required for adoptive applicants, we would like to invite anyone associated with adoption to attend. It will be a very informal session with different areas of the room designated for different topics. This will be a great opportunity to get to know other adoptive couples and ask the questions you really want to know. We can't wait to see you there!

New FSA Website

2009-01-06T20:31:00.000-08:00

FSA Member,

Greeting from the National Families Supporting Adoption Board! We are excited to announce that the Families Supporting Adoption website is live at familiessupportingadoption.org. In order to see the contents of the website, you will be prompted to register, and to create a username and password for future use. The following are just a few of the many feature you will find on this site:

Calendar of Upcoming FSA events

FSA Chapter newsletters across the country

Items for sale at the FSA store

Detailed information on FSA's core efforts and activities

FSA National Newsletter

Presentations from national and regional FSA conferences

Official FSA Handbook

And Much More

Please visit the site soon and tell us what you think and how it can be improved. Thank you for keeping the spirit and practice of adoption alive!

BYU Homecoming Parade

2008-10-01T21:22:00.000-07:00

Come and join us as we promote adoption on our FSA Float. This is such a fun event. Bring you kids and lets fill our float!

Date: October 11th

Time: Meet at 9:30 a.m., Parade starts promptly at 10:00 a.m.

Location: Meet north of the Marriott Center in the parking lot and look for the FSA Float.

FSA National Conference

2008-07-31T15:51:00.000-07:00

For those of you who haven't registered for the FSA Conference, here is the registration link:

www.fsa2008.eventbrite.com

The conference is going to be fabulous so don't miss your chance!

Spanish Fork Parade Float

2008-07-09T22:37:00.001-07:00

Our FSA chapter has reserved a spot in the Spanish Fork Parade. We would love to fill our float with as many people as possible. That date for the parade is July 24, Pioneer Day. If you are interested in riding on the float please contact us at:
sjensen@freedomcu.com

Adoption: From the First Presidency

2008-04-24T20:46:00.001-07:00

“Every effort should be made in helping those who conceive out of wedlock to establish an eternal family relationship. When the probability of a successful marriage is unlikely, unwed parents should be encouraged to place the child for adoption, preferably through LDS [Family] Services” (“Policies and Announcements,” Ensign, Apr. 1999, 80).
“Marriage is the more honorable thing. This means facing up to responsibility. It means giving the child a name, with parents who together can nurture, protect, and love.
“When marriage is not possible, experience has shown that adoption, difficult though this may be for the young mother, may afford a greater opportunity for the child to live a life of happiness. Wise and experienced professional counselors and prayerful bishops can assist in these circumstances.”President Gordon B. Hinckley, “Save the Children,” Ensign, Nov. 1994, 53.

here's a letter from the First Presidency dated june 26, 2002:

Dear Brethren and Sisters:

Parent and priesthood and auxiliary leaders are encouraged to teach members to live chaste and virtuous lives and prepare to receive the ordinances of the temple. Children sealed to parents have claim upon the blessings of the gospel beyond what others are entitled to receive.

When a man and woman conceive a child our of wedlock, every effort should be made to encourage them to marry. When the probability of a successful marriage is unlikely due to age or other circumstances, unwed parents should be counseled to place the child for adoption through LDS Family Services to ensure that the baby will be sealed to temple-worthy parents. Adoption is an unselfish, loving decision that blesses both the birth parents and the child in this lade and in eternity.

Birth parents who do not marry should not be counseled to keep the infant as a condition of repentance or out of a sense of obligation to care for one's own. Unwed parents are not able to provide the blessings of the sealing covenant. Further, they are generally unable to provide a stable, nurturing environment which is so essential for the baby's well-being. Unmarried parents should give prayerful consideration to the best interests of the child and the blessings that can come to an infant who is sealed to a mother and father.

Sincerely your brethren,

Gordon B. Hinckley
Thomas S. Monson
James E. Faust

even though the church's stance is really clear, look at this information:

in 1998 there were over 12,000 LDS unwed mothers.
only 1,984 of those mothers were served by LDS family services.
only 518 infants were placed for adoption through LDS family services.

*there is so much work to do to help mothers get free pregnancy counseling that is available to them to help them make an informed decision.

spread the word:
adoption brings hope to the birth parents, the adoptive couple and most especially ...the baby.

provo fsa chapter

February LDSFS Adoption Training

Christmas gift ideas for Birthparents!

School Presenters Needed!! UPDATED!

October LDSFS training

October LDSFS Adoption Training- SAVE THE DATE!

FSA National Conference 2011

FSA National Conference

Parade Fun

July 25th Spanish Fork Fiest Days Parade

Upcoming events!

Thank you!

Location for adoption training

More info on the upcoming adoption training

Adoption training workshops

The Celebrate Adoption Walk!

FSA's Annual Celebrate Adoption Walk

Christmas Gifts ideas for birth parents

Why Adoption by Rebecca M. Taylor

NOVEMBER IS ADOPTION AWARENESS MONTH!!!!

***Utah Adoption Council at BOONDOCKS***

Saturday November 13, 2010 at 11:00am

Adoption 5K Walk in Salt Lake

Once Upon A Time... Davis and Rebecca's story

Exciting Tax Refund News!!!

24th of July Spanish Fork Parade 2010

Case Worker Spotlight

Open Adoption Blog and Other Internet Sites

Once Upon A Time... Lance and Julie's Story

Provo chapter Facebook page

24th of July Spanish Fork Parade

Once Upon A Time...Mike and Mary's Story

Once Upon A Time...Mike and Brianne's Story

Case Worker Spotlight

Birth Mother's Day and Walk

FSA National Conference Registration is NOW OPEN!!!

FSA National Conference Service Projects

National Conferece Service Project

Day 6 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

Day 5 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

Families Supporting Adoption Walk THIS SATURDAY!!!

Day 4 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

Day 3 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

Day 2 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

Day 1 What Does Being A Birth Mother Mean To You?

Birth Mother's Week!!!

Once Upon A Time....Scott and Amy's story

Temple Night this Tuesday

Provo FSA video

Once Upon A Time.... Bob and Colista's story

Birthmother Walk

Case Worker Spotlight

Infertility Conference

Television Shows that Support Adoption

Once Upon A Time.... Clayton and Angie's Story

Once Upon A Time....Matt and LeMira's story

Supporting the American Fork Skate Night

American Fork Chapter Skate and Celebrate

Once Upon A Time....Sean and Jenn's story

New to our blog

Year End Review

UVU FSA Booth

BYU Homecoming Parade

National FSA Conference

24th of July Spanish Fork Parade

Celebrate Adoption Walk on Birth Mother's Day

Adoption Tax Credit

Adoption Walk

FSA Fall Events

Spanish Fork Parade - come and support

Flyer for National Conference

Mark your calendars!

Horsing Around

Birthmothers Day, Celebrate Adoption Walk

FSA National Conference, Don't Miss It

Great Articles on Adoption This Month

February Workshop - Chat Room

New FSA Website

BYU Homecoming Parade

FSA National Conference

Utah Adoption Council at BOONDOCKS